(This post was meant for Christmas Day, but I am running a day late…)

Merry Christmas to all of you!  May peace, love and joy permeate you and your family  today.

Well, recently I have been thoroughly enraptured with the website Full Homely Divinity (http://fullhomelydivinity.org/) and looked today, Christmas Day,  at the first of the Twelve Days of Christmas.  Today we focus on the wonder of the Divine by the Shepherds.  (We could also include the Wise Men as some religious paths do. In some traditions, Epiphany is the day for The Baptism of Our Lord with a beautiful blessing of the waters.  Some paths include the Wise Men (Three Kings’ Day) on Epiphany.  This back post may assist you  regarding these ideas  here: https://theparentingpassageway.com/2010/01/12/the-magic-of-three-kings-day/ ).

I also looked at the first inspirational message today by Lynn Jericho of Inner Christmas (www.innerchristmas.com to sign up).  Her thoughts today centered around the capacity we all have to wonder, and how in the process we become like the shepherds, the Wise Men, artists, scientists, thinkers.

My meditative focus to you tonight also centers around the act of wonder. 

How do you wonder in your family life?  What brings you wonder as you watch your children?  What brings you quiet joy?

How do you bring wonder and awe and reverence to your children?  If you have read this blog for any length of time, you will see I have strongly encouraged those of you without a spiritual path to consider some literal soul-searching to show your child what your framework for meaning is in the world.  The small child needs to DO in spiritual life, to DO in creating silence and to DO in seeing wonder and reverence and awe.  The small child needs to DO in the life of the festivals in the calendar of the year.  There are many back posts on this subject.

My other thought was that we can all find wonder in the beauty of nature and the changing of the seasons.  I wrote several very popular posts here about connecting your child to nature here   https://theparentingpassageway.com/2008/11/24/connecting-your-children-to-nature/    and here:  https://theparentingpassageway.com/2010/06/09/kidscapes-nature-in-the-city-and-more/

I recommend giving these back posts a read and perhaps even journal as to how you are going to include nature in your plans with your family this coming year.

Over the days prior to Christmas I was reading Rudolf Steiner’s “The Child’s Changing Consciousness As The Basis Of Pedagogical Practice” and this quote is one that many people are familiar with: “Those who have not learned to fold their hands I in prayer during childhood, cannot spread them in blessing in old age.”

Of course Steiner was speaking here of more of the bodily religion of recognizing the wonder of other people, but this quote also reminded me yet again that something that has the capacity to bring wonder and joy to ourselves is daily  prayer and meditation.  For me personally, the Book of Common Prayer along with a Daily Office provides a scriptural, liturgical and meditative focus all in one.  Liturgy really can draw one closer to the Divine.  For those of you coming from a background with little liturgical focus (but you might be willing to try this New Year! ), I recommend a book called  simply “Common Prayer:  A Liturgy For Ordinary Radicals”, which essentially gathers liturgy from different traditions and also marks days of Saints and historical events of social justice import within the calendar of the year.  It has morning, mid-day and evening liturgies for each day of the year and would be a wonderful way to connect to God this year:  http://www.amazon.com/Common-Prayer-Liturgy-Ordinary-Radicals/dp/0310326192/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1293365609&sr=1-1

See what resonates with you most as you focus and meditate and ponder.  Merry Christmas!

Many blessings,

Carrie

Right now we are in the season of Advent.  Christmas Day is the first day of the Christmas season.  There are twelve days of Christmas, also referred to in some circles as the Twelve Holy Nights, that take place from December 25th to January 5th.  This culminates in Epiphany on January 6th and is often marked as either Three Kings’ Day or The Baptism of Christ.  (I found an interesting site with family activities for the Twelve Days of Christmas here:  http://fullhomelydivinity.org/articles/Twelve%20Days%20of%20Christmas%20full%20page.htm , by the way).

This has always been a very special, inward, meditative time of year for me.  You can read my back post about the Holy Nights here:  https://theparentingpassageway.com/2009/12/26/inner-work-for-the-holy-nights/  and here:  https://theparentingpassageway.com/2009/12/22/the-twelve-days-of-christmas/  and here from 2008: https://theparentingpassageway.com/2008/12/24/the-holy-nights/

I will also be offering a series of my favorite back posts during this special time to provide a parenting perspective and meditative focus for these nights.  I like to carry a meditative theme or focus each year – in 2008 and 2009 I worked very hard with the idea of “being easy with myself” (being okay with not being perfect) and this past year I tried adding “letting go” to that.  This year I will be focused on love; love for self, for family, for the world encompasses it all, don’t you think?

What will you be doing during the Twelve Days of Christmas?  Do you have special things you would like to work on this year?

Many blessings,

Carrie

We did an article study over at the Christopherus Waldorf At Home Forum on the article “Meeting Fear and Finding Joy” by Stephen Spitalny.  (To see the study thread, join here: http://www.waldorf-at-home.com/forums/  )  You can read the article for yourself here:  http://www.waldorflibrary.org/Journal_Articles/GW4006.pdf

This article was an interesting read for this time of year and several things about it jumped out at me.  One of the first things I thought about was the initial premise that joy is the opposite of fear:  we meet fear and we find joy.  At first, all   I could  really think was that fearlessness or bravery would be the most common antonym of fear.

But then, the more I thought about the children I have worked with who have had anxiety or fear and then were placed in a situation where they found success, the look on their faces was that of pure joy.  That they could do it!  So perhaps Mr. Spitalny is correct that joy can be the opposite of fear. 

Peacefulness could also be seen as the opposite of fear I think.  Some of the most peaceful people I ever met in my life were those with such a strong spiritual path that they were just calm in the midst of any of life’s storms.

What does this have to do with surrounding the child with  “a Christmas mood”?  One thing that this article postulates, and that many of us who work with children have seen, is that children today are increasingly surrounded by the fears, the anxieties, the stresses of the adult world.  There is less and less separation between the dreamy world of childhood, and the protection that adults used to afford children.  There is less and less knowledge of what children need at different ages.

At the end of this article, Mr. Spitalny describes the Christmas mood this way:

“Dr. Michaela Glöckler speaks about the importance of a “Christmas mood” surrounding the young child. This mood resounds in what Fra Giovanni wrote in 1513:

No heaven can come to us unless our hearts find rest in it today.
Take heaven.
No peace lies in the future which is not hidden in this present instant.
Take Peace.
The gloom of the world is but a shadow; behind it, yet, within our reach, is joy.
Take joy.
And so, at this Christmas time, I greet you with the prayer that for you, now and forever, the day
breaks and the shadows flee away”

If there is one gift in vein of the mood of Advent that one could bestow on one’s children, it would be the gift of returning the small child to the place of being surrounded by love, by warmth, by joy, by peace. 

Can you enjoy your children with reverence and joy?  Do you have fun being together?  Is there humor in your home?  Is there a warm community of people who love your child?

This, to me, is the essence of “the Christmas mood.”  The Christmas mood is the mood that is almost palpable this time of year, for Christians and non-Christians alike, this season of Advent, of hushed preparation and waiting, of inward connection and fortitude in the darkness.

This article states that:

“The`essence of the task of a human being is to connect, to relate, and to find balance. This relating is with other human beings, with one’s own body, with the kingdoms of nature and the elemental word, with spiritual beings, and with one’s own higher self.”

How do you connect and relate and find balance?

How do your children do this?  A child relates perhaps first to its mother as part of itself then expanding to the father or another close caregiver and then through the community.  And woven throughout this is the child relating as a spiritual being on a spiritual path.  These are tasks worthy of education and of life and of thought and meditation as we parent.

These tasks are the essence of the Christmas mood.

Waiting in reverence,

Carrie

Santa Lucia Day is coming on December 13th.  Little by little, I personally gather more and more information and put more details into this festival each year for my own family.

Santa Lucia Day celebrates the life of Saint Lucy and light for the longest night of the year (under the old Gregorian calendar this was the Winter Solstice).  This day usually begins before dawn, with the oldest girl in the family rising to make St. Lucia buns (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lussekatt) and to bring these to her parents. She typically wears white, sometimes with a red sash and a wreath of candles on her head.  Other girls in the family are dressed in white as attendants and the boys are dressed as “star boys” with pointy star hats. I believe in many Scandinavian countries this day  begins the Christmas season.

If you are not familiar with this festival, you can peek at my post from last year regarding Santa Lucia Day and read the story of this special day:  https://theparentingpassageway.com/2009/12/07/santa-lucia-day-in-the-waldorf-home/

Not every Waldorf School celebrates this festival, but some do.  Here is a link to one school’s description of how they celebrate this festival: festival life at Emerson Waldorf School

Here are some ideas for celebrating:

Here is an idea for making a felt Santa Lucia wreath with candles for your daughters:  http://teachinghandwork.blogspot.com/2009/11/santa-lucia.html  (boys typically have a Star Boy hat)

This is handwork for something beautiful for your home:

https://theparentingpassageway.com/2009/12/09/beautiful-santa-lucia-handwork/

Here is another beautiful craft tutorial for this day:  http://www.gingerbreadsnowflakes.com/node/28?page=1

Here are some images of especially cute Santa Lucia clothespin dolls:  http://www.flickr.com/groups/santaluciaclothespindolls/pool/with/3104786151/

Here is a special song to learn to sing:  https://theparentingpassageway.com/2009/12/11/just-in-time-for-santa-lucia-day-a-song/

My post from last year has a recipe for the traditional buns:  https://theparentingpassageway.com/2009/12/07/santa-lucia-day-in-the-waldorf-home/

Happy Celebrating!

Carrie

Last year, I did a whole series on the inner work of parenting and personal development during Advent.

Here is a round-up of these posts: 

Boundaries:  https://theparentingpassageway.com/2009/12/02/cultivating-boundaries-the-inner-work-of-advent/

Holding the Space in Parenting:   https://theparentingpassageway.com/2009/12/19/cultivating-how-to-hold-the-space-the-inner-work-of-advent/

Rhythm:  https://theparentingpassageway.com/2009/12/18/cultivating-a-rhythm-for-your-personal-care-the-inner-work-of-advent/  and here:  https://theparentingpassageway.com/2009/12/01/cultivating-rhythm-the-inner-work-of-advent/

Increasing the Energy in Your Home:  https://theparentingpassageway.com/2009/12/16/cultivating-the-energy-the-inner-work-of-advent/

Cultivating the Quiet in Your Home:  https://theparentingpassageway.com/2009/12/15/cultivating-the-quiet-the-inner-work-of-advent/

Cultivating an Early Bedtime for Yourself:  https://theparentingpassageway.com/2009/12/12/cultivating-the-early-bedtime-for-yourself-the-inner-work-of-advent/

“No Comment”:  https://theparentingpassageway.com/2009/12/11/cultivating-no-comment-the-inner-work-of-advent/

Fun as a Family:  https://theparentingpassageway.com/2009/12/09/cultivating-the-fun-the-inner-work-of-advent/

Staying Home:  https://theparentingpassageway.com/2009/12/06/cultivating-the-ability-to-stay-home-the-inner-work-of-advent/

Gratitude:  https://theparentingpassageway.com/2009/11/29/cultivating-gratitude-the-inner-work-of-advent/

These might be nice to print out and use during your meditation time during the Twelve Holy Nights.

Many blessings,

Carrie

Christine Natale is well-known to many of you from her wonderful  blog  “Straw Into Gold”, found here:  http://threefoldwaldorf.blogspot.com/ or perhaps you know Christine’s wonderful stories.  She has a new book out on Lulu entitled “Fairy Tales” that you can find here:  http://www.lulu.com/product/paperback/fairy-tales/12093029?productTrackingContext=search_results/search_shelf/center/1.

Christine was kind enough to share with me an article she wrote about “Playing Saint Nicholas”; I thought it was a wonderful way to jump start your own ideas about creating new and meaningful holiday traditions that may be very, very different than what you have done in the past.

Without further ado, here are her wise words about her experience and a special link to her stories at St. Nicholas Center!

Thank you to Christine Natale for being so willing to share with my readers!  Happy St. Nicholas Day!

How to Play Saint Nicholas

A long time ago (late 70’s) when I was in my Foundation Year in New York, my first husband and I decided we wanted to “do” Christmas in a different way. We had both been raised with the “million presents” under the Christmas tree 1950s/ 60s/ 70s mentality and we knew we didn’t want that anymore.

We came up with our own way and continued it through our ten years together. We didn’t have any children, so we did it for each other, but we always thought it would be very much fun in a bigger family.

The first part is to “play Saint Nicholas” by baking loaves of Nicholas bread (any kind of bread you like – we put candied fruit and nuts in a yeast bread with an icing cross on top). Then we gift wrapped them and attached a card that just said “From Saint Nicholas”. Then we (yes, we really did this!) went out at night on Saint Nicholas Eve (December 5), hung them on people’s doors, rang the doorbell and ran! We never saw any reaction or heard about it at all later, but it was so much fun and adrenaline- pumping just to do! You could, of course give cookies or anything you want to. It was actually more fun than Trick-or-Treating! Many years later, I filled large gift bags with grocery goodies and left them on the doorsteps of some elderly friends. They suspected me, but I wouldn’t confess.

The next part was about our gifts to each other. We put up our tree on Christmas Eve and made a creche scene for under it. That was all – no presents. It was unbelievably hard to see it that way on Christmas morning after our lifelong conditioning, even though we knew what we were going to do!

For the next twelve days, the Twelve Holy Nights, Saint Nicholas left gifts for us!! Really! We never knew where they would pop up or when. One night, we went out to the movies and when we came home, there was a big easel in the living room for me. I never did find out how it got there! All the gifts had tags that said “From Saint Nicholas” and we hotly denied having given them to each other!

The idea, which would work especially well with children, I think, is that no one would really know who gave them the gift! But the person giving it would know, which would make it more fun in some ways for the giver than the receiver. Then, at dinner on Epiphany (Twelfth Night) everyone would have to guess who really gave their gifts and the real “St. Nicholas” would have to confess.

As I said, having grown up with “hoards” under the tree, it was really kind of awful the first year. But it got to be so much fun that we never looked back after that. Presents appeared in the refrigerator, under pillows, in the car, anywhere!

I have had many experiences, first with my own family of origin and then later as a nanny, where the children plow through the pile of presents and then burst into tears when there aren’t any more! It’s an overload and each gift doesn’t mean very much, really. Spreading it out over the Holy Nights makes Christmas last – it’s not all build up and bust. The gifts don’t need to be flashy and expensive (as you already know) and everyone doesn’t get one every day. Again, helping the children make things for each other and the other spouse and figuring out where and when to hide them keeps the momentum going.

One year, I was staying with a family in the Seattle area. I was trying to help a small school starting there and ended up meeting and living with a family of musicians with 4 (then 5) children. It happened that the night of St. Nicholas Eve, Pam and Philip had gone into Seattle to do a concert and I was taking care of the boys. Geoffrey was 8 or 9, Brenin was 6 or 7 and the twins, Morgan and Marshall were 5. Pam and Philip were and are very special and spiritual people. Pam called me and we realized that we hadn’t prepared anything. I really didn’t have anything except a loaf of cranberry nut bread I had baked and some shiny quarters. Well, I sliced and wrapped up the bread (the boys hadn’t seen me baking it) and put a slice and a quarter in their shoes. Luckily, I always travel with glitter and I sprinkled it from their shoes around the house and out the door into the forest (they live in a rural area). We also had a bunch of carrots with the leaves on and I left them for the donkey (partially eaten). Then, I wrote a scroll, with the messages for each person from Saint Nicholas, tied it with a red ribbon and left it with the shoes. Pam and Philip got in during the wee hours and the boys woke them up shortly after, full of the magic and wonder. It SO doesn’t matter how big or small the gift – it really is the magic that is important.

About Santa Claus – when I introduce Saint Nicholas I explain that he lived in the “Old World” called Europe, far across the ocean. When people moved to the “New World” on this side, Saint Nicholas needed a helper. So he asked Santa Claus to come to the children in America. After a while, people in the “New World” forgot about Saint Nicholas and about asking him to come. But Saint Nicholas is very magical and will come if the children and their parents ask him to. Sometimes, if Saint Nicholas has come to a family, Santa Claus doesn’t need to and he just sends his Christmas blessings as he carries on to visit the children who don’t remember about Saint Nicholas. The children always seemed pretty satisfied with this explanation.

In the Waldorf Kindergarten, I would send home a note asking the parents to send a pair of their children’s best shoes. We set up our circle of chairs before we left with our shoes on them. When we came back the next day, there was a golden nut, an orange, a cookie or small candy cane and a tiny present. I remember one year it was a little wooden top. And if Saint Nicholas couldn’t visit us in person, there was always a scroll tied with red ribbon for teacher to read what he had to tell each child.

I created a series of stories to use in the Kindergarten in the days leading up to Saint Nicholas Day on December 6. I couldn’t find stories to explain many of the European traditions such as the shoes, golden nut, etc., so I looked into my heart and came up with “fairy tale truth” which may not be worldly fact, but true in its meaning. These have been posted on the Saint Nicholas Center website for many years.

Saint Nicholas Stories

http://www.stnicholascenter.org/Brix?pageID=437

The picture on the Saint Nicholas website with the story number five is Saint Nicholas and Knecht Rupert visiting our Kindergarten in Seattle. Saint Nicholas brought a big golden book and had something written there for each of us, including me!

Thank you, Christine, for sharing your wisdom and experience here with us today.

Happy St. Nicholas Day and many blessings,

Carrie

The second week of Advent is upon us already! Here is the verse attributed to Rudolf Steiner  that goes with the second week:

“The second light of Advent is the light of plants–
Plants that reach up to the sun and in the breezes dance.”

Here are a few fast ideas regarding the second week of Advent:

• Here is a link from the  Waldorf Newsletter Clearing House that contains an Advent Poem and an Advent story of “The Little Christmas Rose” : http://www.waldorflibrary.org/Clearing%20House/Fall%201981b.pdf
• This is a week many families obtain their Christmas tree if this is part of your tradition.
• This week is Saint Nicholas Day.   To learn more about St. Nicholas, you can see this post I wrote last year:  https://theparentingpassageway.com/2009/11/26/saint-nicholas-day-in-the-waldorf-home/.    Here is a Saint Nicholas story from over at The Baldwin Project:  http://www.mainlesson.com/display.php?author=pyle&book=wonder&story=gifts  and another one here:  http://www.mainlesson.com/display.php?author=olcott&book=holidays&story=purses/  Here is the chapter about “The Dutch Twins” celebrating Saint Nicholas Day:  http://www.mainlesson.com/display.php?author=perkins&book=dutch&story=skates
• This could be a wonderful week to hang greenery in your home and outside.
• Jodie Mesler of Home Music Making has modified the tune and lyrics of “The Holly and the Ivy” in order to have it resound with the beauty of nature:  http://homemusicmaking.blogspot.com/2010/11/advent-song-3.html
• This may be a lovely week to make some natural garland for your Christmas tree or to hang somewhere inside your home. 

Many blessings for a lovely week,

Carrie

Here is a round-up of ideas for the first week of Advent with many links for free resources on the Internet:

Here is the “Children’s Song of the Nativity”.  The music and words are traditional; one written version can be found in Candey Verney’s “The Singing Year” book (with accompanying CD).  Here is a version on YouTube sung by the St. Patrick Cathedral’s Boy Choir in Dublin:

I was unsuccessful in locating any other song from the Winter Wynstones on YouTube, so if anyone else has leads as to where an audio for these Winter songs are, please do leave a comment so we all can listen.  I know these books can be very tough if you do not read music well!

For this week, some families are telling stories about  Mother Mary (many families are also using song/ring games that have to do with Mother Mary). Some are telling Saint Nicholas stories in preparation for Saint Nicholas Day on Monday (I believe the Orthodox Church celebrates the Feast day of this saint later in the month).  Here is a link to all the stories over at the St. Nicholas Center:  http://www.stnicholascenter.org/Brix?pageID=890.  You might also consider the festival stories by Eugene Schwartz here: http://members.millennialchild.com/products/catalog_page/Resources_FestivalStories.html

Good crafts for this week include making an Advent Wreath if you have not already, making an Advent Calendar, crafts for Saint Nicholas (see this link for ideas:  http://www.stnicholascenter.org/Brix?pageID=122), baking Christmas treats and cookies, starting Christmas gifts from the children to others, making homemade wrapping paper.

Most of all, have fun together and await with reverence this magical time of the year,

Carrie