Co-Sleeping and Nighttime Parenting

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For those of you co-sleeping with your children, Attachment Parenting’s International Research Group has released a position paper that may be of interest to you:

http://www.attachmentparenting.org/pdfs/APIRG_safe_sleep_%20position_paper.pdf

My own thoughts on nighttime parenting generally run toward personal amusement as new parents repeatedly get asked the same question, “Is the baby a good sleeper?” 

What exactly does that term mean?  What does the term “good sleeper” mean to you?  That they sleep 12 hours at 2 weeks of age?  That you can shut the door and say, “I am off-duty for 12 hours, see you when I open the door  in the morning?”

Parenting does not work like that, does it?  The suggestion is humorous, yet in American society, it is almost what people seem to expect.  Immediate independence of the baby from the parents.  Rugged solitary individualism.

Because I love other cultures and anthropological kinds of studies, for me this question of “good sleep”  always leads to me to think about the cultural connotations of sleep.

There is a wonderful book that many of you probably know called, “Our Babies, Ourselves,” by Meredith Small.  It is a fascinating book and here are some interesting sleep facts:

  • For most of human history a baby has slept with his or her mother, or perhaps both parents. 
  • It was not even until 200 years ago cultures began to construct dwellings with more than one room. The majority of people around the world still live in one -room shelters where all activities take place.
  • 50 out of 136 cultures evaluated by anthropologist John Whiting found mother slept with child and father slept in another place.
  • In 67 percent of cultures around the world children sleep either in parent’s room and/or bed. Japanese teenagers sleep in their parents’ room.

Newborn babies sleep for short periods interspersed by even shorter periods of wakefulness.   Interestingly enough, babies enter sleep through the REM sleep cycle, which is different than adults, and they also spend more time in REM sleep than adults.   By three to four months, establishment of nocturnal and diurnal cycles takes places and eventually consolidates into longer periods of sleep.  Many babies will sleep four hours at a time in the first few weeks, some will  reach eight hours of continuous sleep by 4 months of age.

Sleeping through the night by medical standards is not a 8 hour stretch, however.  It is a stretch from midnight to five am.  Dr.  Sears has said that 70 percent of babies slept from midnight to 5 am by 3 months of age, with another 13 percent doing that by 6 months of age.  Ten percent of infants did not sleep uninterrupted throughout the first year.

“ALL children will sleep like adults,eventually, it is just a matter of how long it takes them to achieve this pattern.” says Dr. William Sears.

However, the amount of sleep in other cultures seems  variable, according to Meredith Small.  She cites , for example, that:

  • Kipsigis African babies wake three to four times a night until they are eight months old
  • Dutch children sleep 2 hours more a day than American children

James McKenna, the well-known anthropological sleep researcher from University of Notre Dame,  believes that all of us are designed to be biphasic sleepers designed to sleep twice in a 24 hour period.  His website is very interesting and can be found here:  http://www.nd.edu/~jmckenn1/lab/index.html

Mothers and babies who sleep together are in sync and are physiologically entwined in that  the movements,breathing of one partner, mother or baby, affect the other. This may be important because each time the baby responds to an arousal by its mom, the response sets in motion a cycle that gives infants additional practice in breathing.  Co-sleeping mothers exhibit five times the protective response behaviors toward their babies.

When co-sleeping, infants spend greater amounts of time in levels 1-2  of sleep and less time at the deeper levels, exhibit more REM sleep, and are awake longer.  This is important for protection against SIDS. 

The other benefit for co-sleeping for older babies who are  still nursing at night is that many calories may be obtained at night.  Research has show babies as old as ten months of age were receiving up to 25 percent of their calories at night.  McKenna reports infants who co-sleep and breastfeed at night wake up for shorter periods of time and have less crying than breastfeeding infants sleeping not in proximity to their mothers.

If your baby is an older baby or toddler and is frequently waking, there could be true physical causes of night waking.  The baby could be hungry or thirsty, hot or cold, or wet.  Teething could be a factor or also other developmental milestones.  Reflux and food allergies can also be a culprit.   I have talked to many mothers whose infants had history of reflux and were on medications and when their infant “grew out of their reflux” and were taken off their medications, they had a toddler with frequent night waking.  It may be worth further investigation if this sounds like your toddler. 

Noise, environmental irritants, stuffy nose, allergy, ear infections, pinworms, UTI,  and pain at night can also impact night waking for the older baby and toddler.

Safe co-sleeping is paramount.  Here is a partial list of parameters for safe co-sleeping from www.naturalchild.org:

 

Safety while cosleeping is of utmost importance. Parents should take very seriously the importance of providing their babies with a safe sleeping environment. There are many guidelines, most of which are common sense (Sears, 1995b; Thevenin, 1987). To start with, the bed must be arranged in such a way as to eliminate the possibility of the child falling out. This can be done using a mesh guardrail, a special cosleeper crib (with three sides), or by pushing the bed flush against the wall, making sure there are no crevices which could entrap the baby. Next, in the early months, parents must be sure to place the baby next to the mother rather than between the parents as fathers are not usually as aware of their infants as the mothers are at first. Cosleepers should use a large bed or a sidecar arrangement, with a three-sided crib clamped flush to the mother’s side of the bed and the mattresses set to the same level. They should avoid using heavy comforters or pillows near the infant. Babies should not be overdressed as the warmth of the mother will be shared with the child. Infants who cosleep are usually breastfed throughout the night; this is to be encouraged. Waterbeds, sofas, and other soft surfaces should not be the location for cosleeping (Heinig, 2000; Sears, 1995b; Thevenin, 1987). Most importantly, parents should not cosleep if they are seriously sleep-deprived or under the influence of drugs or alcohol. Parents who are smokers should not cosleep as secondary smoke greatly increases the risk of death from SIDS (McKenna et al., 1993; Sears, 1995b).

For the full article, which is full of anthropological studies and references and is really, really interesting, please see here:  http://www.naturalchild.org/guest/tami_breazeale.html

Other detailed safety parameters can be found here:

http://www.mothering.com/articles/new_baby/sleep/family-bed-safety.html

Here are some recommendations from that Mothering article by James McKenna:

James J. McKenna, professor of anthropology and director of the University of Notre Dame’s Center for Behavioral Studies of Mother-Infant Sleep, has this to say about the CPSC study: “It attempted to medicalize an event that is a rational issue. It is a safety issue, but not only a safety issue. . . . Most babies die in cribs, so do you conclude that cribs are dangerous and babies should sleep with parents? No, you concentrate on solving the problem, but with cosleeping you attempt to eliminate the practice. That is not science, that is a cultural choice.”2

McKenna’s work has gone a long way toward helping parents who do choose to cosleep keep their babies safe. Here is a list of rules for family bed safety:

  • For parents who smoke, drink, or are unusually heavy sleepers, or use any kind of drugs that inhibit arousal from sleep, cosleeping on the same surface with a baby is not recommended, said McKenna. For these parents, having their child sleep on a separate surface near them, such as a cradle or bassinet, will protect the baby from overlaying while still providing the baby with many of the same benefits as cosleeping.
  • Make sure the surface your baby sleeps on is firm. “There are many adult mattresses that can match the stiffness of CPSC recommendations,” McKenna said. Avoid waterbeds, lambskins, and other soft bedding for your baby. Stuffed animals and toys should be kept out of the baby’s sleep environment.
  • Don’t give pillows to babies or young toddlers, and keep their faces away from your pillow. Keep blankets away from babies’ faces, too.
  • Cosleeping babies are kept warmer than solitary sleeping babies, so they need lighter blankets and pajamas. (Being too warm may be a factor in SIDS.)
  • Toddlers should not be allowed to sleep next to infants, said McKenna, because “They are too unaware of the dangers their bodies pose.” Instead, either the infant or the toddler can sleep on a separate surface next to the family bed—the infant in a cosleeper, crib, or bassinet; the toddler in a toddler bed or mattress on the floor.
  • Headboards, footboards, and side rails can be unsafe, especially if a baby is left alone in bed with these trappings. One of the most dangerous situations for young children is getting their heads wedged in furniture, said McKenna. He suggested making sure the child’s head can’t fit between the side rail and any surrounding surfaces. If a parent is using a crib as a sidecar, make sure the two mattresses are on the same level and held tightly together, so there is no space that a baby could slip into. If a bed is up against a wall, ensure that there are no gaps in which a child’s head can get trapped. Another option is to put the mattress right on the floor, so that side rails are not necessary to prevent a baby from falling off the bed.
  • Do not sleep on the sofa with your baby, or leave a sleeping baby alone on a sofa.
  • Do not leave a baby unattended in an adult bed. The benefits of the family bed exist only when the parents are there with the child; if the parents want some adult time while baby sleeps, the child should be put somewhere else—such as a crib, bassinet, or mattress on the floor—until the parents are ready for him to join them, McKenna said.

Co-sleeping is a cultural choice; there are many benefits to co-sleeping once a safe sleeping environment is ascertained.

Happy, peaceful dreams and safe co-sleeping,

Carrie

A Waldorf Perspective: Filling Up or Unfolding?

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I was re-reading the lovely book “Active Arithmetic” by Henning Andersen.  Many of the things in this book are geared toward the Waldorf classroom, and therefore not everyone finds this a useful addition to their Waldorf homeschooling library, but I personally think there are some gems in this little book.  The attitude that this long-term Danish Waldorf teacher brings is particularly powerful:

“One must know, in addition, that human development is not the sort of growth in which something is first small, then bigger, preserving the same basic structure.  Rather it is one where abilities are completely transformed during growth from one level to another.  A child is this kind of being, undergoing complete transformation on its way to adulthood.

In this regard the teacher must have great patience, not only from day to day when he must question the children on yesterday’s lesson, but also from year to year, and even from one phase of life to  the next.  Perhaps the biggest obstacles a teacher has to overcome is to avoid wanting to harvest the next day that which he has sown only the day before.

He goes on to compare the role of a teacher to that of a midwife:

….we can only act as midwife for the abilities that are already latent in the child – awaiting opportunities for growth which we as teachers can create for them.  That alone is our contribution as teachers, and this does not make the job any less responsible – on the contrary, only more so.

In arithmetic and mathematics the question then becomes the same as everywhere else:  “What do the children bring with them?” and not, “What does society demand we put into them?”  What laws of development must be followed if these inner qualities are to be brought out?  Or put another way, is is not a question of creating something, but more of bringing something forth.

In our particular case, we must ask, “What mathematics lies already buried within the child, and what are the rules for nurturing this already existing substance?”

Waldorf education looks at not filling the child’s head with facts, factoids and bits and pieces, but examines what the child has within them and how to best build on that to provide a comprehensive education.  The child entering first grade should be in their bodies, and we can use movement of the body to build upon the child’s counting skills.  The child knows verses and songs orally from Kindergarten, and we can use this for writing practice and then for the child to read from what they wrote.

Waldorf education is comprehensive, rigorous and builds upon itself throughout the grades to provide a complete education, but the teacher is viewed as a guide, a presenter, a natural and kind authority who builds upon the unique abilities, talents and temperaments of each child, observes what lies within each child,  and assists the unfolding of the child’s development through the academic curriculum.  Every seven year cycle builds upon the cycle that came before, and builds toward future physical and emotional health.

Waldorf education does not look to “fill students up” with meaningless chatter and facts, but serves to marry the unfolding maturation and soul development of the child with economy of teaching to lead to wonder of the human journey.

It is a great ride, and I invite all of you to come along.

Carrie

Baby Steps to Waldorf Rhythm

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I have had some parents ask me once they have their awake, nap, and bed times pretty well-established, where should they go from there in terms of rhythm or general Waldorf lifestyle?

I think this is very individual depending upon the situation of the family, the ages of the children, but I am going to toss out some possible suggestions for those with children under the age of 7:

The first place to start is ALWAYS with YOURSELF.  You must find at least ten minutes for you to sit uninterrupted and think and meditate on what the needs of your family really are, and what steps you need to guide them and set the tone in your own home.  This is always first!

Think seriously about the way Steiner viewed the needs of the small child – to be firmly in their home environment, less words, music and singing and verses, less stimulation with protection of the 12 senses.  Stop talking to your under 7 child as if they are a miniature adult and respect their right to be LITTLE and innocent.  That is big inner work to see if  you believe in this view, and how you implement this day-to-day.

After that, there are several possibilities:

One possibility would be to next focus on your environment – decluttering your house, establishing routines for cleaning your house, and establishing routines for cooking real home-cooked foods made with love for your family.  A place of help for you may be www.flylady.net.

If you were a family where there was very little structure in place and this a big transition for you all, perhaps consider starting with outside time for your child each day at the same time, and adding some structure by doing some practical work every day that your child can see.  The younger the child is, the less time this may take and you may have to build up the time gradually.  Steiner felt even 15 minutes of quality work done in a peaceful manner was wonderful for the child to see.  There are posts on this blog regarding connecting children to nature and on fostering creative play that may be of service to you.

If you have your home essentially in order, and some structure is in place, then perhaps you start building toward a storytelling time each day and some preparation toward festivals.

If you can get all that going, now is the time to pick a skill of the skill list on the post regarding “A Mother’s Job in the Waldorf Homeschool Kindergarten” and start to educate yourself.

I would love to hear from other families ways they made the transition.

Happy pondering,

Carrie

Hopeless With Waldorf?

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(Addendum as of March 28, 2009:  This post has had 416 hits as of today which kind of cracks me up because I wrote it completely off the cuff in about 10 minutes!  If you are new to my blog, please do have a look around.  There are lots of posts about the developmental characteristics of the ages of children 7 and under, lots of posts on gentle discipline, co-sleeping, breastfeeding and more (and of course there are A LOT of posts on Waldorf homeschooling and life with Waldorf).  I am glad to have you as a reader today!  Thank you!)

I have recently talked to three separate mothers who are feeling hopeless and overwhelmed with Waldorf.  I would like to take this opportunity to shatter the Waldorf myths – excuse me while I go put on my silk, hand-dyed cape!

Okay, now I am back, so here goes:

1.  Being Waldorf does NOT mean that you will always walk around singing and as happy as a Mary Poppins on Valium.  It does mean you will do your best to take some time for YOURSELF and breathe.  It does mean you will try to set the tone for your home, because if you don’t do it, no one else will.

2.  Being Waldorf does NOT mean you can never have another plastic toy in your house ever again.  It does mean you WILL seriously pare down your clutter of toys and get rid of a lot of them.  It does mean you may take the time to set up inviting areas in your home for your kids to want to play in – maybe a kitchen area, a dress-up area.

3.  Being Waldorf does NOT mean you have to go and stand outside in sub-freezing weather everyday because “we are outside in all kinds of weather, no matter what.”  It does mean you will make a very concerted effort to get your kids outside on most days when this is reasonable and that you will try to make it around the same time most days.

4.  Being Waldorf does NOT mean you have to get rid of your TV, but it does mean you will not turn it on during the day and that your kids will not watch it if they are little.  It does mean you are going to work hard to NOT surf on your PC all day, except to read this blog 🙂

5.  Being Waldorf does NOT mean your house has to be perfectly clean and spotless with you standing there in an apron with your broom (although I personally love my apron).  It does mean you will make a reasonable effort to keep your house picked up by having several times during the day where you pick up, that you  will allot time at the end of an activity to clean-up with your children, and that you will try to clean your house and cook some homemade meals.  Baby steps – start small.

6.  Being Waldorf does NOT mean you will never go out during the week anymore, but it does mean you will work to be firmly entrenched in your home, especially if you have small children.  It does mean you will think about the number of playdates and classes and such a four-year-old really needs (my vote is for none!)

7.  Being Waldorf does NOT mean that you are sunk if you cannot make your own bread, knit, sew, paint, model and play pennywhistle, but it does mean you will try to learn little by little.  Maybe you will find other Waldorf homeschooling parents to learn from.  Maybe, gasp, you will attend a workshop or class without your children and learn so you can show them and be a better teacher.  The joy of being human is that we can learn, do better and we are not stagnate!

8.  Being Waldorf does NOT mean you cannot use an open and go curriculum. Melisa Nielsen creates one, and so does Donna Simmons.  It may mean that after you do this Waldorf homeschooling for awhile you may be inspired to create your own, and it is okay to take a few minutes each day to work on it before the next school year.

9.  Being Waldorf does NOT mean you have to honor every traditional Waldorf festival they would celebrate in a school.  Pick the ones that speak to you and your family, start small and add things to it every year.  This is a learning practice.

10.  Being Waldorf does NOT mean you cannot include your child’s interests in your homeschooling experience, but it DOES mean you understand the reasons of WHY Waldorf teaches WHAT when and you  can work with that.

11.  Being Waldorf does NOT mean that your children have to go to bed at 6:30 forever, but it does mean that you shoot for the same bedtime every night and the same awake time every day.  After awhile, you and your children will love this and it will not be a battle, but you have to persevere for at least 21 days!  21 days to make a new habit!  And, as a homeschooling mother, you will appreciate the time to yourself.

12.  Being Waldorf does NOT mean you will never get there, it just may take time!

Be easy with yourselves out there, start small and dream big!  Seek guidance from other Waldorf mothers and don’t just settle on something less than Waldorf if you feel Waldorf is really right for your family!  Make it work for you!

You can do this!!

Love to all,

Carrie

Differences Between “The Well-Trained Mind” and Waldorf: The Early Years

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Someone pointed out to me that The Well-Trained Mind encourages art and stories within their curriculum as well, so what is so different about the two curriculums?  This was a person with very little experience in Waldorf who had never seen a Main Lesson Book or seen how the children create throughout a three-day rhythm in a Waldorf environment as they learn, but I still thought it was an interesting question.

I would like to take moment to address this question here in this post for you all.  This first table is for the pre-school years of The Well-Trained Mind, which encompasses the Waldorf Kindergarten Years of ages 3-6.

  The Well-Trained Mind Waldorf
How to Teach Reading “Talk, talk, talk – adult talk, not baby talk.  Talk to her while you’re walking in the park, while you’re riding in the care, while you’re fixing dinner.” (page  27)
”Read, read, read.  Start reading chunky baby books to your baby in her crib.  Give her sturdy books that she can look at alone. (A torn book or two is a small price to pay for literacy).  Read picture books, pointing at the words with your finger.  Read the same books over and over’; repetition builds literacy…..Read books onto tapes, along with the child’s comments, so that she can listen to you read over and over again.” (page 27, TWTM, page 27)
”After you read to your toddler, ask her questions about the story.  Why did the gingerbread man run away from the little old woman?  Why did all the dogs want to go to the top of the tree in Go, Dog, Go?  Why did Bananas Gorilla take all the bananas?” (Page 27)		 Steiner did not advocate teaching reading to children still within the first seven-year cycle.  The child is seen as needing their energy for growth and development of the physical body until the forces are  freed for memorization.  It is not that the child cannot learn reading at this age, but that the child ‘s growth and development should be protected at this point by the adult.  Steiner felt early memorization, instruction and such came at a price to the child’s future health as an adult.
”Accomplishments that come with forces that are available later on should never be forced into  an earlier stage, unless we are prepared to ruin the physical organism.” Steiner, page 116, Soul Economy.Talking for the sake of talking is not seen as promoting the vital concept of warmth and is also seen as pulling the child into their head with lots of verbal play; but singing, verses, pictorial imagery, oral storytelling  is strongly encouraged.  Talking to your child is encouraged, just perhaps not the running commentary of what you are doing every minute the way TWTM suggests.
Picture books are limited so the child can make pictures in their own mind, and the same picture books and fairy tales and nature stories are told over and over for weeks or a month at a time to work deeply on the child’s soul.  The child memorizes the stories, songs and verses from the repetition, and the stories come out in the child’s play
Use of Television and Videos Limit television and videos. Same, no television or videos preferable
Writing “Very young children (under two) will pick up a pencil and imitate scribbling.  Teach a child from the beginning to  hold the pencil correctly.  Draw lots of circles and loops in a counterclockwise direction……Teach your three year old basic dot-to-dot skills by drawing your own dot-to-dot picture…” (pages 28-29) Some Waldorf Kindergartens do  artistic drawing, but none teach letters or do dot-to-dot diagrams within the Kindergarten ages of 3-6.  Letter and handwriting are taught in First Grade through such artistic activities as form drawing, modeling the letters, drawing objects that begin with a letter and seeing how that turns into the abstract letter.  Pictures that the child draws, such as a house, is seen on an archtypical level.
Math “Start to make your child “mathematically literate” in the toddler years…..Bring numbers into everyday life as often as possible….Once the child is comfortable counting, you can start working on simple math sums – usually during the K-4 and K-5 years.” (page 29) Pre-mathematics literacy is laid early through oral stories, fingerplays, rhymes.  Qualities of numbers, all four math processes, Roman numerals, all are introduced in Grade One.
“kindergarten” for four and five year olds “….it’s a rare five year old who’s ready to do very much paper-and-pencil work at a desk, and a six year old who hasn’t done a formal kindergarten program can easily begin first-grade work.”
”Kindergarten for four year olds accomplishes even less.  Most four year olds have microscopic attention spans, immature hand-eye coordination, and a bad case of the wiggles.”
”In about thirty minutes per day, you can teach your child beginning reading, writing, and math concepts, all without workbooks or teacher’s manuals.” (page 30).		 Waldorf Kindergarten does not focus on reading or writing or math per say at this early age, but strives to lay healthy foundations for these subjects through a variety of sensory and practical life experiences for when the student is ready for academic work in Grade One.  Each year of Kindergarten the student has more complex stories, projects and responsibilities.

Students in Waldorf kindergarten certainly do learn colors, shapes, things such as above, below, on, weights and measurements, pre-mathematical literacy.  Some Waldorf Kindergarteners can read if they have taught themselves, but the focus really is on the BODY at this young age.
Reading for four and five year olds “You should continue to immerse four and five year olds in language, just as you’ve been doing since birth.  Read with them in the “real world”….Get them books on tape…….Susan’s three year old and five year old listened to all of Kipling’s Just So Stories, the original Jungle Book, all of Edith Nesbit’s books, The Chronicles of Narnia, Barrie’s densely written Peter Pan…….” (page 32) Steiner believed children of this age should be in their bodies and reading should come later.The stories mentioned in the WTM quote to the left are wonderful works of literature, but included much later in the Waldorf curriculum at a time when those types of stories would be seen as speaking to a child….A child under the age of seven is living in a world of connection and oneness with things, and stories with strong protagonists the child can identify with (as opposed to the archetypal figures of fairy tales), do not come in until later.
Method of teaching reading for four and five year olds Recommends “The Ordinary Parent’s Guide to Teaching Reading, by Jessie Wise, contains clear step-by-step instructions on how to teach reading from the very beginning stages, starting with letter sounds and moving systematically through blending sounds into reading real words and sentences.” (page 33)
”Remember, you want the child to read quickly, easily, and early.  Many children are ready to read long before they have the muscular coordination to write.  Why delay reading until the muscles of the hand and eye catch up?” (page 38)		 Live singing, live music, storytelling, drama, all lay a strong foundation for language literacyAnd for the record, Waldorf does not teach reading through a strictly phonetic approach where the child must read three letter words with only short “A” in them to start – the Waldorf approach to reading is whole word, whole language with the letter sounds included.  See below.  The letter sounds are introduced in First Grade, with letter emphasis on word families and reading from the written word of things the child knows very well – songs and verses
Math for four and five year olds Real world math, and “your public library should have a colorful selection of kindergarten-level math books- easy problems worked out with photographed objects.  Get a book every week, and read through it.” See above.

Steiner recommended rapid introduction to the numbers in the First Grade with rapid transition into introducing all four math processes.
Science for the four and five year old “You can supplement beginning reading, writing, and math by doing a science experiment once or twice a week; more formal science study isn’t necessary at this age.” The child is considered from a developmental standpoint  one with nature; the connection between nature and the child is fostered through outside time, building with natural materials, preparing for festivals, reverence for living things
Art and Music Not mentioned The child has a variety of musical and  artistic experiences through wet-on-wet watercolor painting, modeling, play outside with natural materials, music with lyre, singing, Circle Time throughout the day
Gross Motor Skills not mentioned Continually fostered through almost every activity in the kindergarten, including very active Circle times and outside time where building with natural materials is encouraged, nature walks of longer duration
Practical Life Skills not mentioned Fostered through preparation of snack, bread making, gardening, wood working, housekeeping and other experiences
Spirituality Not mentioned in preschool section; mentioned on page 204 as part of Grades section.  “Education cannot be neutral when it comes to faith; it is either supportive or destructive.  The topic of education is humanity, its accomplishments, its discoveries, its savage treatment of its own kind, its willingness to endure self-sacrifice.  And you cannot learn- or teach- about humanity without considering God.” The child is assumed to be a spiritual being from a spiritual place; reverence is instilled through verses and songs, preparation for festivals, gardening and being outside daily in all kinds of weather
The festivals celebrated often have a Christian-Judeo background, but all the world religions are taught within the curriculum throughout the years.   For more information please see post entitled “Refreshed and Renewed.”
Emphasis on Rhythm, Protection of the 12 Senses Not mentioned Very unique to Waldorf and seen as vital to a child’s health – there are many posts on this blog about rhythm!

Protection is a big factor within the early years, with repetition and reverence being hallmarks toward that, along with warmth of the teacher, warm foods, warmth in  the  environment
The role of the teacher  I couldn’t find any direct quotes really, perhaps someone else more familiar with this work can? “Children are entrusted to us for their education.  They are a sacred trust we receive.” (From Soul Economy). 
The view of the child’s academic ability To be filled by the teacher through exposure to print books, to audio books, to concepts and counting The teacher is a guide, an observer and a leader in setting rhythm and health as the child’s development and maturation unfolds.

 

 

As you can see, Waldorf and The Well-Trained Mind have very different premises about what the young child needs in the early years for future health and academic success, although there is brief  overlap on such things as limiting media exposure.  However, the things Waldorf views as most important for the small child – less words, more singing, music, oral stories, outside time, getting children in their bodies, rhythm, protection of the senses, REPETITION of the same stories and things is wanted and promoted – is not even mentioned by The Well-Trained Mind.

They are just very different approaches, in my opinion.  As Melisa Nielsen says, TWTM is a wonderful product if that is the way you want to go.  My addition to this thought though is to make sure this is the way you want to go, the way you see your homeschooling experience reflecting your values and priorities for your child.

Food for thought,

Carrie

More Inspiration for Teaching from Steiner’s “Human Values in Education.”

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Yes, more from what I am reading.  On page 55, this passage made me stop and think:

We see the higher processes abstracted in all the lower stages of the process.  An imponderable relationship arises between you and the students; and the children make real progress in their education as long as you do not get the idea that they are ignorant and you are clever; you must stand before the children, aware that this is a fact in the world, and that you are leading them to believe in something that you yourself believe with all your heart.”

There is the heart of the matter.  Do you believe a child under the age of 7 can benefit by NOT doing academics at this point?  Do you believe a child of the age of 7 needs to approach things through art, music and imagination?  Do you believe in the value of the fairy tales for a 7 year old – that this is what they need for their development of their soul, to see that good always overcomes?  Do you believe that an 8 year old needs to see the  duality of man through the Saints – people who did other worldly things- and the trickster tales?  Do you believe a child in the throes of the 9 year old change needs to hear about the relationship of man to authority in Old Testament stories?

If you don’t believe, what is attracting you to Waldorf?  Why are you considering this for your child’s education?  What healing needs to be done in you so you can teach this and truly believe?

If these questions are difficult, perhaps a one-on-one consultation with one of the nationally known Waldorf consultants could be of assistance to you.  See a list to pick from here:  https://theparentingpassageway.com/2009/01/03/waldorf-consultants/

Your children deserve your authenticity and exploration into this matter!

Peaceful journeying to you,

Carrie

Inspiring Words from Steiner’s “Human Values in Education”

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I have recently been reading Steiner’s “Human Values in Education.”  This book is a sequence of the last lectures on education that Steiner ever gave before he died.  The back cover states, “…he was graced with a remarkable clarify and penetration that allowed him to address old topics (as well as new) with uncanny spiritual luminosity, precision, and sheer humanity.  If anyone is looking for the “last word” on Waldorf education, this is perhaps it- in  more ways than one.”

On page 87, this passage really struck me and I hope it will make you stop and think:

“During the years between the change of teeth and puberty, we are concerned not just with the obvious, because when we consider the whole of human life something else also becomes obvious.  At the age of eight, I absorb some concept; I do not yet understand it fully – in fact, I don’t understand it fully- in fact, I don’t understand its abstract meaning at all.  I am not yet constituted in a way that makes this possible.  So why do I take in such a concept at all?  It is because my teacher is speaking; my teacher’s authority is a given, and it works on me.  These days, however, we are not supposed to do this; children are supposed to be shown only what is visible and obvious.

Consider children who are taught everything in this way.  Their experiences do not grow with them, because this method treats them as beings who do not grow.  But we should not awaken ideas in children if those ideas are unable to grow with them; this is like making a pair of shoes for a three-year old and expecting that child to wear them at the age of twelve.  Everything in human beings grows,  including the power of comprehension; consequently, concepts must be able to grow as well.  We must therefore make sure we bring living concepts to children, but we cannot do this unless children have a living relationship to the teacher’s authority.  And this cannot be accomplished by abstract, pedantic teachers who stand in front of children and give them concepts that are still completely alien to them.”

So, food for thought:

How are you teaching these days?  Are you teaching your four year old like a four year old and your eight year old like an eight year old?

Where is the active part of your lesson?

Are you teaching through art and music for the 7 to 14 year old crowd?

Do you understand the big picture that Waldorf education is fostering in each different seven year cycle?

Have you read any Steiner lately?

Are you prepared for class each day?

Is your rhythm on or off?

Happy teaching,

Carrie

Starting Solids With Your Infant and Picky Toddler Eating

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This post is for all mothers who wonder about infant and toddler feeding and what is “normal”.  Remember, human milk is the primary source of your infant’s nutrition throughout the first year and solids is mainly a sensory (read teaspoons to tablespoons) kind of experience.  In our society we act as if infants should be putting away jars upon jars of baby food a day!  This is not how the human digestive system was designed!

Early Solids WILL NOT help your baby sleep through the night, make your baby less fussy, make your baby grow up later or develop earlier or provide better nutrition than breast milk!

Normal Course of Appetite (Ames) up to age 6:

  • Usually infant doubles birth weight by the time they start solids
  • Usually the birth weight is tripled by the end of the first year
  • Cup feeding may be started in middle of first year
  • At 12 to 15 months, the gross motor drive is strong – may be difficult to sit and eat a meal, may want to stand in highchair if family using one
  • After 12 months, toddler may go through phase of not being interested in cup
  • 15 to 18 months toddler very interested in self-feeding
  • May throw food
  • 21 month old may have definite preferences, such as a certain bib, a certain spoon, a certain dish – but may not have the words to express it! Easily distractible
  • 24 months – preferences are high, may be related to taste, form, consistency, color – Think small helpings, teaspoon sized! Ritual demand of eating the same things reaches its height at 2 ½. Food jags prevalent.
  • 3 years old – Eating better, appetite fluctuates less, the child has become a good chewer . On the downside, may dawdle if eats with whole family.
  • May prefer raw vegetables, desserts, may accept green vegetables.
  • 4 years old – Chief problems are talks too much, usually has to interrupt meal to go to bathroom, has much trouble sitting still
  • 4 ½ to 5 – A distinct rise in appetite, can listen as well as talk at the dinner table, may use a knife for spreading but not for cutting
  • 6 years – Perpetual activity! Cannot sit still, wiggles in chair, eats with finger, talks with mouth full, cannot finish meal. Preferences and refusals very strong.

Signs of Developmental Readiness to Start Solids as per La Leche League:

  • Usually middle of first year
  • Your baby has at least doubled his/her birth weight or weighs at least 14 pounds
  • Your baby can sit up with support
  • Your baby has control of his/her head and neck
  • Your baby has the ability to transfer food from the front of the mouth to the back of the mouth (tongue-thrust reflex has disappeared)
  • Your baby may have a tooth or two
  • Your baby is capable of refusing food
  • Your baby likes to imitate people and showing distinct interest in food, not just the silverware
  • Your baby can reach and handle food, toys, objects
  • Your baby has increased saliva production necessary for digestion
  • Your baby is not ill and has no rashes

WHAT FIRST FOODS  SHOULD I FEED MY INFANT?

  • Different cultures start with different first foods – you may want to think specifically about foods that provide decent mineral quality for supplemental foods.
  • La Leche League typically says to start with banana, pears, applesauce (make your own), cooked carrots, sweet potatoes and winter squash, avocados.  Some cultures start with meat as a first food!
  • Use your own clean finger as the first spoon
  • Offer new foods in the morning  in case of allergic reaction

 

One book you may consider on this topic is the classic “Feeding the Whole Family:  Recipes for Babies, Young Children, and Their Parents” by Cynthia Lair.  It takes recipes the whole family can eat, and suggests how to take all or parts of the recipe to make food your infant can eat as well.  All recipes are centered on fresh, whole foods ingredients.

Top Asked Questions Regarding Sources of:

Iron (per Dr. Sears Family Nutrition Book)

Beef (4 ounces) 3.5 mg

Ground beef (4 ounces) 2.5 mg

Lamb (4 ounces) 2.5 mg

Turkey, dark meat (4 ounces) 2.5 mg

Beans (1/2 cup) 2.0 mg

Chickpeas

Best Plant Food Sources of Iron (per Dr. Sears Family Nutrition Book):

Tofu (1/3 cup) – 7 mg

Iron-fortified cereals (1 ounce) 4-8 mg

Cream of Wheat (1/2 cup cooked) – 5 mg

Lentils (1/2 cup cooked) – 3 mg

Prune Juice (8 oz) – 3 mg

Dried Peaches – 3.1 mg for 6 halves

Pumpkin Seeds, 1 ounce – 4.0 mg

Signs of Anemia (Iron-Deficiency Anemia): paleness, weakness, fatigue, shortness of breath, irritability, difficulty concentrating, increased susceptibility to infection, intolerance of cold temperatures, constipation, brittle nails

Zinc (per Dr. Sears Family Nutrition Book)

Top Zinc Veggies:

Tofu (1/2 cup) – 2.00 mg

Artichoke – 1.47 mg

Chickpeas (1/2 cup canned) – 1.25 mg

Beans (kidney, lima, ½ cup) -0.75 mg

Dr. Sears writes in his book that many children with ADHD have lower levels of zinc and essential fatty acids; this may be worth looking into if your child has that challenge! 

Tips for Picky Toddler Eaters

DO NOT USE FOOD AS A BRIBE TO EAT OTHER FOODS OR AS A REWARD OR PUNISHMENT.

Serve food attractively, give small helpings, serve food without comment, do not stress amount of food to be eaten, be aware some food refusals may indicate an allergic reaction to that food, try to maintain a calm and unworried attitude toward your child’s eating, do not stress table manners with young children, allow finger-feeding until child has become proficient at eating and is interested in food.

Try:

1. Offer a nibble tray – put out a muffin tin and put a little food in each tray (apple moons, avocado boats, banana, broccoli trees, carrots, cheese cubes, hard boiled egg, little o shaped cereal)

2. Offer dip – made from cottage cheese, tofu, yogurt

3. Try smoothies

4. Serve it attractively

5. Respect that a child’s stomach is about the size of their fist

6. Let the kids eat at a child sized table where their feet can touch the ground

7. Let the kids cook or help prepare food

Food Allergies per La Leche League:

Top foods to cause allergic reactions: beans, berries, cabbage, chocolate, cinnamon, citrus fruits and juices, coconut, corn, cow’s milk, eggs, nuts (especially peanuts – and peanut allergy is a type of allergy that children do NOT outgrow as they age), onions, pork, shellfish, tomatoes, wheat.

Typically tolerated foods include:

Fruit – apples, apricots, bananas, peaches, pears, plums

Vegetable – asparagus, beets, carrots, squash, sweet potatoes

Rice and grains such as oats, barley, millet

Common Signs of Food Allergies: (Dr. Sears)

Skin – Hives, Red Sandpaper-Like Facial Rash, Dry/Itchy/Scaly Skin on face, Swelling in Hands and Feet, Puffy Eyelids, Dark Circles Under Eyes, Lip Swelling, Tongue Soreness and Cracks

Respiratory – Sneezing, Runny Nose, Stuffy Nose, Wheezing, Watery Eyes, Rattling Chest, Persistent Cough, Congestion, Bronchitis, Recurring Ear Infections

Intestines– Burnlike Rash Around Anus, Abdominal Discomfort, Mucusy Diarrhea, Constipation, Intestinal Bleeding, Poor Weight Gain, Bloating/Gassiness, Excessive Spitting Up, Vomiting

Behavior – Fatigue, Migraine Headaches, Hyperactivity, Crying, Irritability, Night Waking, Anxiety, Crankiness, Sore Muscles and Joints

The scoop on juice: (La Leche League)

For ages six to twelve months, no more than four ounces of juice a day (That’s half a cup!)

For toddlers and preschoolers, no more than six ounces a day (3/4 of a cup)

For school age children, no more than eight ounces (1 cup of juice a day)

Water, water, water!

Please do see the post on this blog regarding WHY fresh juice made by YOU is much better than the pasteurized stuff from the store!!  Here is the link:  https://theparentingpassageway.com/2008/11/18/give-us-our-daily-juice/

You may also be interested in this post regarding Steiner’s grain of the day from a Waldorf perspective: 

https://theparentingpassageway.com/2008/11/23/steiners-grain-of-the-day/

A neat solution for grain rotation for the health of your family should you choose to eat grains!  According to Dr. Sears, the grains highest in iron are quinoa, amaranth, oats, enriched rice, millet and barley.  The grains highest in zinc per Dr. Sears are wild rice, rye, amaranth, oats and quinoa.  Tops for folic acid are millet, wild rice, rye, amaranth and oats.

Happy infant and toddler feeding,

Carrie

Is It Too Late? – For Those Children Over Seven

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I wrote a post here  https://theparentingpassageway.com/2009/02/14/is-it-too-late/   entitled “Is It Too Late?” about parents who are trying to implement a Waldorf approach to life and homeschooling with children who are six and under.

This begged the question from one reader about what to do and how to approach the seven, eight, and nine year old crowd.

I do think some of the principles are the same, and some of the principles are different simply because the seven, eight, and nine year olds are in a different seven- year cycle than a five or six year old.

Some things to think about, some from that previous post and some new:

Always start here:  If you have had no rhythm at all, start small with consistent awake times, bedtimes, and meal times.  Think foods made with your own hands and foods that are not far removed from what they really are….a whole apple as opposed to processed apple Pop-Tarts.  Think about the amount of sugar, dyes, additives your children are ingesting and work hard to limit those substances.

2.  Set up some areas within your home for artwork, woodworking.  Start with being outside a lot alternating with periods of working with hands.  Work on handwork yourself in the afternoon for a few hours each day and show your child.

3.  I feel strongly that a child of this age, while it should be the beginning of real explanations and such, may still need less words and worry.  Try hard not to discuss world politics or stressful family things in front of this child.  This child was in his head before his time, and while you cannot perhaps go completely back, you can keep from progressing things too  rapidly forward. 

4.  This child needs HOURS a day outside to just be without much comment or fuss. Natural landscapes with experiences in all kinds of weather.

6.  No media.  No media at all during this transformation.  No screens.   And model good behavior by cutting down on your screen time…can you do it?

7.  Plan some fun FAMILY activities with you, your partner, your child, siblings.  Sometimes these often serious and tense children need to see that, indeed, the family can have fun and laugh together.  It does not have to be something over the top and expensive – plan something like going hiking, roller skating, ice skating, planting a garden together, star watching.  Also do some projects around the house together so your child can see how a family works and plays together.

9. Start working within yourself to be the change for the things you want to see in your family.  You set the tone for things in your family, you have a choice as to how you respond to things.  You don’t need to nag your partner about all this, but instead model, show, demonstrate, love.

WHAT STEINER FELT WAS IMPORTANT FOR THE FIRST PART OF THE  SECOND SEVEN YEAR CYCLE: (From Soul Economy, “Children From the Seventh to the Tenth Year”)

Because of the development of the ether body, the children are now working in the ‘rhythms of breathing and circulation.”  “Children now have a strong desire to experience the emerging life of soul and spirit on waves of rhythm and beat within the body – quite subconsciously, of course.”  We are still working within the will.

Children aged 7  to 9 are beginning to differentiate themselves from others; up until the seventh year they really feel they are directly connected with others.  The beginning of separation the 7 to 9 year old feels really shows itself with them longing to be around the adult and to have  strong feeling for authority.  Steiner felt the need for authority was an inborn need at this age.  He said, “When we say “authority” however, we mean children’s natural response to a teacher- never enforced authority.”

Steiner felt the gratitude that must be fostered in the early years is the first mood of the soul.  Love is the second mood of the soul, and he felt that needed to be nurtured in moral and religious life.  “We can provide a firm foundation for this kind of love by helping children make a gradual transition from the stage of imitation and authority, in the ninth or tenth year, to a genuine feeling of love for their teachers, whose bearing and general behavior at school must naturally warrant it.”  He goes on to say, “We often hear the admonition to love our neighbor as ourselves, and God above everything, yet we see little evidence of it.  Life at school should try to assure that such things are not just talked about but become infused with new life.”

I have a previous post that may also be of service to you:  https://theparentingpassageway.com/2008/12/20/the-seven-to-fourteen-year-old/

For those of you with children on the brink of the nine-year-old change, I strongly recommend you read this article:  http://www.waldorfinthehome.org/2005/01/parenting_the_nine_year_old.html

Waldorf is so healing for the whole family; it is never too late to look at what your child needs and fulfill that.

Wishing you love on your journey,

Carrie

Resources for the Waldorf Kindergarten Years

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Lovey over at Lovey-land has a great list of resources to go with the skills list we came up with in this post:  https://theparentingpassageway.com/2009/03/09/a-mothers-job-in-the-waldorf-homeschool-kindergarten/

(Sorry all, as of 1/2011 Lovey land’s blog is closed).

I decided to put my own picks here, food for thought for you:

Essentials:

One of the following: You Are Your Child’s First Teacher, Beyond the Rainbow Bridge or Heaven on Earth.  Your public library may have copies of these.

To Read the Following (may find on-line):  Rudolf Steiner’s The Education of the Child and Kingdom of Childhood are good places to start.  My personal favorite for awhile now has been Soul Economy as well.  Your public library may have some of these titles, and also check out the Rudolf Steiner Audio Archives.

For Inner Work:  Read works by Steiner, “Knowledge of Higher Worlds” is recommended by many as a place to start.  Discern why you feel called to homemaking and how you will set the tone in your home.  Journaling may help you.

For putting together things for your Kindergarten:  Let Us Form A Ring, a copy of Grimms Fairy Tales (The Pantheon Version), Suzanne Down’s Autumn Tales and Spring Tales and any of the seasonal Wynstones Press books.  Earthways is nice for crafts, but A Child’s Seasonal Treasury also has crafts and I think crafts are not too hard to track down on line.

For Movement:  Joyful Movement by Donna Simmons.

One festival book:  A Child’s Seasonal Treasury, which may be available at the library has verses and songs and crafts by season, other ones include All Year Round which is a Christian perspective, Celebrating Irish Festivals, or others.

If you absolutely must have some kind of “curriculum” : Either Melisa Nielsen’s Before the Journey and Journey Through Waldorf Kindergarten OR Donna Simmons’ Waldorf Kindergarten At Home with Your 3- 6 Year Old.

Baking, gardening, woodworking, housekeeping ideas and plans  really can be gathered through on-line resources and asking on Yahoo!Group Waldorf lists.

Most of all, do NOT be a curriculum junkie. I see so many mothers who are buying everything and doing NOTHING.  Pick something and DO.  Your child needs your take on things, your creativity, your festival plans and not just the stuff listed in a book.  You know your child best and can plan what will speak to their heart and soul  best.

All my best,

Carrie