“High needs homeschooling” is a term I use to describe any of the following situations:  homeschooling children with special needs;  homeschooling a supreme extrovert with an introverted, highly sensitive parent;  homeschooling with difficult home dynamics (whether that is medical crisis or financial crisis or something else).

I think in all of these cases, we have to think carefully about whether or not homeschooling is meeting the needs of the entirety of the family, including the parents.  Here are just a few thoughts on homeschooling in these situations:

When you are an introverted, highly sensitive mother with extroverted children:

Consider the long-term plan. Homeschooling numbers tend to dwindle going into middle school and moreso into high school. Will there be enough of a peer group to support your extroverted child? Understand that extroverts are not automatically met better in the school environment, but I do think it is something that deserves thought as an extrovert nears the high school age.   If your extroverted child wants lots to do – clubs and sports- are you willing to drive and be out of the house?  If that doesn’t nourish you, and you feel that you must do it, how will you replenish yourself?

How will you structure your day so you will feel nourished?  This could include the use of audio books instead of reading outloud every day ( yes, I know this wouldn’t happen in a Waldorf School but remember Waldorf homeschooling is not Waldorf School); it could include daily quiet time; it could include sending multiple children outside to play in a safe space without you; it could include the fun of pairing up older siblings and younger siblings for helping with school-related tasks; it could be gently transitioning older students into more independent work so long as they don’t have learning challenges that make this difficult.  Oak Meadow used to be one of the only options for this approach of writing to the student, but I am pleased to see some new products coming out from Christopherus that are geared directly to the middle school student and acknowledges the changes that can occur in the upper grades in homeschooling and the need for more independent work.

Finally, please do acknowledge that all of us need relationships, whether we are introverted or extroverted. We can plan our time with other people carefully if it drains us, but maybe we should be finding relationships for everyone in the family that aren’t draining.  Good lesson for life.  And if you really feel you don’t need one friend, one time out to be without your children during the month…well, maybe you are early in your homeschooling journey or your children are small, but I really think you will want this eventually. 🙂

Homeschooling Children with Special Needs…

This can be very draining and lonely for some parents.  It is hard to teach the same things year after year, such a large amount of repetition, and see only incremental progress.  It is hard to teach every single subject through high school when your child cannot prepare any of the work by themselves at all – so it is still all on you as the teacher, tutor, guide.  And, it is something few other homeschooling parents can really understand unless they are in it themselves.  It can be a grieving process at times, especially as children enter the teen years.   So, you need to know going into homeschooling your child with special needs is that the overall goal may be more about being steady and persistent in engaging our children to learn, and not so much about the final, perfect outcome.

Remember all the other parts of “education” – experience, the arts, social learning, emotional learning, nature studies, practical work – all of these things are so very important.  You cannot change and wish away your child’s struggles, but you can expand all the opportunities and you can celebrate all the victories!

Find your support.  This is important for every homeschooling parent, but incredibly important for parents who are teaching children with special needs.  Also, find support for your children – this might be therapy, or getting neuropsychological testing, or finding other children who accept your child, or the support of a wonderful community.  Every situation looks different, but support is crucial.

There are studies that show homeschoolers with special needs are more engaged with their academic work than students in traditional school settings.  Please don’t undervalue your hard work!  You are making a difference, even if it seems small to you right now.

Homeschooling with extenuating circumstances :

The homeschool community often seems hit hard with bad luck and misfortune.  I think we all know families (or we have been that family!)  that have been hit with one thing right after another, from loss of employment, low funds, house fires, accidents that caused medical bills, chronic disease, and more.  Sometimes a family is really forced to give up homeschooling for traditional school and parental employment, but I have seen other families really hang on through the worst of times.  In these circumstances, which are so individual, it is hard to give specific suggestions except to…

Live within your means, and work to decrease debt and increase income for the family member who is working.  I thought this article did a good job regarding thinking about homeschooling on one income.

Consider how to homeschool as inexpensively as possible.  Traditional homeschooling – ie, used textbooks or free on line sources, may be some of the cheaper ways to homeschool, but I think there are many ways one can homeschool using Waldorf methodology on a budget as well.  The library is a fantastic resource for putting blocks together.

(A side note here:  Waldorf curriculum is rather a difficult thing to afford for many families.  On one hand,  the authors deserve to be fairly compensated for their experience and work (hours and hours to create a curriculum!); I think the cost that many complain about in the Waldorf homeschooling community regarding curriculum isn’t that different a cost than many of the mainstream curriculums that are inclusive.  However many families I know still can’t really afford to buy a homeschooling curriculum.  There are more and more free resources out there for Waldorf homeschooling, especially for grades 1-3, so that can be helpful.  The upper grades can still be self- done, I have done it several times over, but it takes a lot of work and time.  Might be something to consider in planning if you are going to homeschool through middle school and high school. 

Garner support from your extended family and community.  You may need meals, help with cleaning or laundry or outside work, support, help with caring for children.  Build up your support network, and trade these things as best as you can.  Sometimes places of worship, or networks built around a love of  a particular activity can be helpful.

Here is a back post of possible interest:  Surving Bedrest and Being Homebound with Medically Fragile Children

I would love to hear how you have tackled some of these situations in your family!  Please share your experiences and help other families out.

Blessings and love on this fourth day of Christmastide!  I am posting some of my inner work from Christmastide on Facebook and Instagram, so please do follow me over there – Facebook  and @theparentingpassageway on Instagram.

Love,

Carrie

I see you.

You, up researching different methods of homeschooling and curriculums into the wee hours of the night.

You, trying to thrive on one income and an old car with multiple children and still have money to put towards curriculum and supplies and outside activities.

You, trying to explain to your partner and extended family why homeschooling meets your children’s needs so well.

You, who hasn’t done a good job going to the doctor or dentist  for yourself in quite awhile because it means dragging four children with you whom you homeschool without much in the way of support or breaks.

You, single mom, working and still making homeschooling work.

You, who has the child with the hardest things on the inside that no one recognizes in your child.  You see the depression, the anxiety, the anger – and you keep on researching, getting help, and putting one foot in front of the other.

You, who has the child with learning disabilities that you are working so hard with one one one and wondering if it is enough or if other people will see homeschooling as the reason your child is behind instead of being possibly ahead of where he or she would be in other settings

You, who has the twice exceptional child wondering how to make the most of homeschooling for giftedness but also the most out of all therapy, rehabiliation, and doctor’s appointments.

You, who are agonizing over homeschooling high school – if it’s the best thing, the right thing, how to do it, will it screw up their lives forever?

You, trying to pick the best read-alouds and worrying how to get the best education to your children and meet all the needs.

You, trying to juggle the house, a baby, a toddler, a preschooler, and the grades.

You, trying not be tired at night after a full day of homeschooling  so you can  be awake enough to converse with your partner.

You, in the trenches.  I see you.  I see the wholeness of you and you are enough.  You are worthy, you are wonderful.

You are doing a great job.  We are all a mess and we are all beautiful. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

Blessings and love,
Carrie

There is so much chatter on the Facebook groups and on IG regarding Waldorf Curriculum and finding a curriculum that matches the family. Usually this means a family wants a more open and go curriculum where they don’t have to spend hours putting things together or adding to a curriculum, or it may mean they are searching for a more multi-cultural approach than what is out there currently.

This is a challenge, because at its heart, Waldorf Education is a way of educating and developing yourself, as the teacher, a way of understanding the development of the human being as a spiritual being and THEN bringing to life the indications that Rudolf Steiner left behind to the specific student in front of you also tailored to the specific place and culture in which you live.  On top of that, the indications most developed was in this work was developed by the Waldorf Schools, and as we all know, school is not home.   Certain blocks, which may or may not reflect your heritage or culture, are matched to the archtypal developement of the human being, but perhaps don’t resonate with you.   What a challenge!

To make things more complex. there are not many choices on the Waldorf homeschooling market compared to homeschooling curricula and products in general.  I think there is room for more products to emerge, not less.  Each curriculum has a different voice, just as in a Waldorf School each classroom teacher has a different voice and way of doing things. True Waldorf Curriculums are not really open and go as they are supposed to guide a teacher toward creating their own stories, finding the things that really speaks to that teacher/classroom or teacher/student dyad.  In this way, it is a lot like parenting and finding your own empowered voice to bring this to life for your children.

However, I understand:

• Being new, never having seen a Waldorf School and trying to Waldorf homeschool
• Living in a place that has ZERO support.  There are absolutely no other homeschoolers Waldorf homeschooling!
• Wondering why things are they way they are – why are there Hebrew Stories in Third Grade?  Why are there Ancient Mythologies in fifth?  Why can’t we find much about America in the curriculum and as an American what can I do with that?
• What can I adjust/change and what do I really need to leave into the curriculum for my homeschooled student?
• Making main lessons work for our family – Waldorf teachers often can’t imagine teaching three main lessons a day or combinbing main lessons, yet Waldorf homeschooling mothers do this EVERY DAY. We rock!

It can feel frustrating!  So here are my ideas about curriculum and making it work for you:

1.  Look at the blocks brought by the schools in your region.   You can easily search Waldorf Schools all over the world from your computer.   Many blocks are the same across the world, but sometimes there are different ones tailored to place and culture.  These give us the glimmers into what can be that also had a solid pedagogical foundation.
2. That being said, don’t give up on the traditional blocks completely- find a way to bring in what your family needs.  I wouldn’t eliminate a traditional block because there are specific reasons for that block to be there as it relates  to childhood development, but I would consider adding a block or adding stories for handwork, painting, modeling, cooking, festivals that reflect our individual place and time within an understanding of the development of the child.  I have done back posts tracing what I see as some of the ways to put Latin America and Africa into the blocks here:  Extending Africa Through The Curriculum. Extending Indigenous Cultures Throughout The Curriculum Extending Latin America Throughout The Curriculum
3. Stick to a curriculum and do your best to make it work. Work with the author(s) of that curriculum in consultations!   It is much easier than skipping around in the long run.  You will develop a system (and it will be simpler than trying to gather from 20 resources unless  you use 20 library books to put a block together, which is what I do a lot).  You can see more about choosing a curriculum here: Which Waldorf Curriculum Should I Buy?
4. Read Rudolf Steiner’s lectures.  Yes, I know for some people they are difficult.  Or you don’t agree with everything in them.  That’s okay. His work will change you and your view of the human being regardless.  I suggest “Discussions With Teachers”, “Practical Advice To Teachers”, “Education for Adolescents” for the grades, and “Kingdom of Childhood” and “A Child’s Changing Consciousness” for those of you with small children.
5. Work with art.  I used to set up an ironing board in my bedroom with paints mixed, water ready and paper and jump out of bed in the morning and paint for ten minutes when I had tiny children. If you aren’t a little bit hungry and willing to DO something, this form of education may not work for you and your family in the long run.  And that’s okay, but if your goal is to make this work for your family, you are going to have to work a little.
6. Work with your own biography.  The book I used in Foundation Studies, which is the introductory training you must complete before Waldorf teacher training,  was “The Human Life:  Understanding Your Biography,” by George and Gisela O’Neil.  I also have gone chapter by chapter through Betty Staley’s book, ““Tapestries”,” which is another good one.
7. Consider community.  You may find non-Waldorf people who can knit and help you and  your children learn.  You may form a study group to read Steiner’s lectures or books related to Waldorf Education or a group to paint together or a group for festivals.  All the workshops and study groups I have been in have really helped by journey and even if I stopped doing Waldorf Education tomorrow, I wouldn’t regret that time because it helped me understand myself and the human being better.
8. Patience.  “Doing Waldorf” isn’t add -water instant.  It is a journey and a growth process.  Your Waldorf may not look like someone else’s.  Capitalize on your strengths and slowly work to bring in the things you are less sure of.

If you need help and would like a consult with me, please email me at admin@theparentingpassageway.com.  I do phone consultations at different points during the year, and will be opening up a few slots in December for a mid-year check in.

Lots of love to you all,

Carrie

There are quite a few good resources out there for homeschooling high school, (not for homeschooling a Waldorf-inspired high school per se, but homeschooling high school in general).  Many parents whose children are in seventh or eighth grade wonder if homeschooling high school is for them.

We are three years into homeschooling high school with our oldest child now, and looking at options for our eighth grader for high school next fall.  I think it is important to at least look at options for several reasons…

1. I don’t know how it is in your area of the world, but here while every student can be “accepted” to public high school in the later high school years, the school system does not have to accept the credits already completed and may make the student re-do classes.  This is important to know.  At least  in my area, it is much easier to enter into high school when it begins in 9th grade and pull out and finish up homeschooling than it is to start homeschooling and then try to enter public school  in 10th or 11th grade!
2. Homeschooling, for the most part, can be a very decentralized process – so that could mean a lot of driving and extra money toward classes or things that might normally be “free” in school and wouldn’t involve you driving.  For example, our oldest has taken some AP classes.  This involved extra time in finding these classes, and extra money to pay for the classes and the driving to and from the classes.
3. Is you child super extroverted or introverted?  I know some extroverts who are still happy to homeschool high school, and some extroverts who are happy to do something like dual enrollment, but there are many extroverts who want to be a in a school environment and be involved in all the traditional high school things withinin a more traditional high school community.  Some want a much bigger social pool than the sometimes small numbers that homeschooling high school leads to, depending upon your area, so that may also be a factor to think about.
4. How well do you and your teenager work together?  If it is going to be nothing but you nagging your child to get work done, or if  you feel your child tends to withdraw and not want to work hard for you, you might consider a more traditional high school plan.  It is hard to facilitate something with only one other (reluctant) student, and sometimes a group does lead to more interesting projects, more interesting perspective, and more interesting conversations.  You can create this with work at home for sure – open up your house to all homeschoolers for projects or perspectives around a study area, for example, but some students thrive in a more traditional environment.
5. In this vein, does your child prefer in-person learning or do they prefer to learn on-line?  Not every student enjoys on-line classes, and while there are on-line high school classes for subjects, some students want or learn better in  a classroom experience.
6. Are you decent at keeping track of records?  Do you know when things normally happen as far as standardized testing, financial aid deadlines, college applications?These things are important if your child wants to apply to a four year college as you will be playing guidance counselor along with your other roles in homeschooling.

If you think it sounds like I am against homeschooling high school, I am not. We are homeschooling high school, after all, and looking at doing it again!   However, I think some of the homeschooling high school sites tout homeschooling high school as this thing where the student works independently and you have interesting conversations, and  that’s about it, and are not pointing out some of the larger issues to think about.  Homeschooling high school takes time and availability of the parent, and it also depends somewhat upon finances, ability to get your student to places if options for homeschooled high schoolers in your area exist as far as outside classes or activities,  the homeschooling high school community in your area, and your student’s goals  for what they want to do after high school.  Sometimes post-graduation goals are best met in the home environment, but sometimes a more traditional path can also work, and some students prefer this.

For those of you homeschooling high school, what are the things you thought about with this decision?  Share your wisdom!

Blessings and love,

Carrie