Beautiful, Meditative Candlemas

Candle candle burning bright

Winter’s halfway done tonight

With a-glowing we are knowing

Spring will come again

-Candlemas Verse, Unknown Author

Have you ever been just so weary?  So exhausted?  If you have tiny children you see those sweet little bodies to fill with warming foods and coaxing into rest and sleep; if you have elementary-aged children  you are helping to balance burgeoning minds with wonder and bodies with rest and exercise; if you have teenagers maybe you are dealing with restless energy heading toward an uncertain future…and in between all of this you are cooking, cleaning, nourishing a spouse or partner perhaps, and maybe trying to take care of your own physical, emotional and spiritual needs so you can be on your game to do it all again tomorrow.

I feel your weariness.  I feel your exhaustion .  I feel you trying to hold on in order to nourish everything and everyone in your life.

I think Candlemas (February 2nd) feels this too.  Candlemas is this beautiful, quiet, still pause to remind us of hope.  Spring will come again.  Light will come to the world.  Newness can grow out of old.  Growth can come out of weary.

Candlemas can be the most lovely day to start with a beautiful breakfast of sunny yellow pancakes or crepes.  Candle dipping is such a meditative activity for the day; a gesture of bringing light into the winter of the world and the winter of our souls.   Other ways to work with candles include making earth candles, floating candles, or rolling beeswax candles.  We can offer stories of our friends the bees who give us fragrant, smooth beeswax as their offering.  We can offer this as a time of the half-way between Winter Solstice and Spring Equinox.  If you could have a bonfire, that could be a beautiful way to end the day.

If you are looking for some more ideas regarding this festival, here are a few back posts regarding the Feast of St. Brigid, Candlemas and Groundhog Day.

I have a few other suggestions for this day.  Perhaps this would be a beautiful half-way point to survey yourself.  What is your self-care?  Where are things between you and your spouse or partner?  How much sleep and exercise are you eating?  What can  you do to nourish yourself on this special day of light and love so you can shine light on and love your little corner of the world?

Love to you on Candlemas,

Carrie

 

 

 

Three Reasons I Need Rhythm…

I find many of us are still trying to get our rhythm back at this time of year.  I know I am!  Actually, in my world of the Anglican Communion, we are still in the season of Epiphany and now coming up to Lent, so there is this sense of still being in the middle of things in a way….and many of us find our children grow and change over the holidays, so whilst the work of the day may remain, perhaps meal times or outside times or bedtimes needs to shift around.  Never be afraid to make a rhythm that works for you!  I always start by looking at what pattern we are in, and then seeing if it needs to change…or maybe it is a real pattern that remains..

Rhythm is this idea of a flow to the day; it is not a schedule because it is  flow -oriented and not as time-oriented perhaps as a schedule (although there may be times assigned to meals and bedtime).  It provides an order to the day and a sense of strength for the parent because it takes away some of the thinking involved with every single decision we have to make in a day.  If you know your errand day is on Friday, then you don’t need to go out on Tuesday, for example.  If you know you always put your boots after your walk in one spot as part of cleaning up from your nature walk each day, then you don’t have to round up boots that land in various places.  Rhythm just IS, like the tide coming in and going out or sun coming up and setting.

The three reasons I  particularly need rhythm are:

To continually remind me of the importance of the home. In a society that often does not seem to value being home except for short pit stops between activities (even for small children), rhythm in my home reminds me of the time and care it takes to create a nourishing environment and that there is value in that for the health of all of us in the family.  Ideally, in a home full of rhythm, a small child would be able to tell what day of the week it is by the meaningful work being done in the home on those days.  For example,  perhaps Tuesdays are always ironing days or Thursdays are always bread making days or Mondays are always the cleaning of the home from the weekend.  Traditionally, Waldorf Education has assigned different work to different days based upon more planetary influences (does that sound esoteric enough?!), so there are suggestions from Waldorf kindergartens for different activities for different days of the week.

It reminds me of the importance of what I call “soul hygiene” – that there should be a time and place in the day for inner work, for physical activity outside, for sleep and rest.  This helps remind me to pace myself and to honor these activities.  This helps me remember my main goal of parenting is to help my children be healthy adults – healthy physically, emotionally, in how they see light in others and how they communicate with others, spiritually.

We set up the environment with care, which teaches me attentiveness to activities and models this for my children.  We might have a song or verses to go with the activity.  We put things away  and clean up with care.  Again, it forces me to slow down and see the value of the activities we are doing for the physical, emotional and spiritual realms.

Lastly, (yes, I couldn’t resist sneaking in reason number four!) is that rhythm is your aid to discipline.  When we know when things will happen and how it will happen, it cuts down arguing.  This time of year, that can be valuable.  It is even valuable for teenagers and older children.

How is your rhythm valuable to you?

Blessings,
Carrie

 

Four Steps Toward Parenting Together

I have heard it said that parenting involves not just thinking alike, but thinking together.  Parenting in a relationship means that the needs and thoughts of both parties have to be considered and communicated and compromised upon.  It is hard work, but I encourage you to do the work.  If I have parents reading this who are in their 20s and early 30s, I really want to encourage you to do this work now.   I am in my 40s, and unfortunately there are many divorces going on amongst beautiful couples that we know – but most of the divorces had roots from when these couples were in their late twenties or early thirties.  So, I would like to share five tips for those working toward parenting (and unifying other aspects of their life as well!) together.

  1.  Parenting is just one aspect of how a couple communicates, respects and appreciates each other. I think “parenting” comes up as this hot button – whether it is breastfeeding, c0-sleeping, educational choices, discipline – but it really is a facet of: how do we communicate as a couple; does my spouse or partner respect me by listening to me and respecting my ideas and opinions as well; do we appreciate what each one of us brings to the table in this process?  What do we both really value most for our family life?
  2. If communication skills and compromise are difficult and you both feel as if you are just going over the same thing in a circular fashion with no compromise or resolution, get help from a third party (earlier rather than later!).  Many counselors work on a sliding scale, and many places of religious worship offer counseling as well. This chapter (https://theparentingpassageway.com/2012/08/26/overcome-gridlock-the-seven-principles-for-making-marriage-work/)  in Dr. Gottman’s book about overcoming gridlock could also be helpful to you as a process at home.
  3. Have a set time to address challenges that are coming up in family life.  When is actually a good time to talk through things that are important, where you can focus together without being interrupted?
  4. Cultivate some patience.  Not every issue in attempting to co-parent or be unified always works out in compromise; sometimes the differences are still there but they are livable differences.  Sometimes opinions change as one partner models things and shares with the other partner.

Many blessings,
Carrie

Meal Planning for January

I love these cold January days.  We have been hiking numerous days in a row, the sun shining through the bare trees, the hawks flying around us, the rivers running fast and high.

We have also been home, basking in candlelight, salt lamps, cozy woolen warmth and fires.  Books and board games and creating things.  It makes my heart so happy.  We have had places to get to, but not so much that one feels rushed or overwhelmed.  I love this time of year.  One thing I deeply enjoy this time of year is the warmth and love of the kitchen. I have a pot of bone broth going right now.  I love to cook and I cook frequently.  Warming foods seems so important.  I am no cooking expert at all, but I would love for my readers to  share some ideas for your favorite foods for this month and ideas for meal planning, and I will share a few of mine.

For warming drinks for little people, I like warm apple cider and raspberry tea.  For older children, I like hot chocolate.  Bone broths can also be a satisfying hot drink.

Smoothies feel a little out of place to me in January when it is cold, but I have to admit that sometimes a smoothie is my breakfast or lunch when everyone else wants something that is higher in carbohydrates that I don’t feel like eating.  I like ice with water, chocolate protein powder, a banana, and a little bit of chocolate coconut almond butter.  You could also add greens to it, and whatever powdered adaptogenic herbs you like.

For breakfasts, we have been having spinach scrambled eggs in tortillas with salsa, waffles on special festival days, buttermilk pancakes, and oatmeal done in a rice cooker with cinnamon and chopped apple.  Also, we have been juicing.  For my husband especially I have been making a combination of beet, apple, pear, carrot and lemon.  It is yummy, and our six year old really likes it too!

Lunch has always been the hardest meal for me to figure out.  I recently took Beauty That Moves Freezer Cooking Class.  I love Heather’s recipes, and I have been trying out many of her recipes from this class for lunch.  So, right now on our rotation we have some legume dishes, soups, and rice bakes and I usually cook fish for one lunch a week.

For dinner, we usually do some sort of crockpot meal.  This can include pastured chicken or pork from our local farmer or some sort of bison, along with some vegetarian meals.  I am not huge on wheat, but we do like barley or millet mixed with lentils or split peas or roasted potatoes and lots of vegetables.

I have been trying to cut desserts down after the holidays, which is hard with the sweet tooth of all the children, so if we have to have something baked apples are so warm and lovely.

I would love to hear what you have been cooking!

Blessings,
Carrie

The Impulse of Martin Luther King Jr.

Only three  American federal holidays are named after specific people:  George Washington’s birthday, Abraham Lincoln’s birthday and Martin Luther King Jr. Day.  The impulse of Dr. King has been on my mind as of late, in this month of celebration of his life and legacy.  I have long written about bringing the American impulse into Waldorf homeschooling  and American festivals into the cycle of the year, and this is the first chance we have to do this in a formal way in 2016.

We are lucky to live in the Deep South and within driving distance of the Martin Luther King Jr. National Historic site.  It was a beautiful day as we explored the site, which included  the Ebenezer Baptist Church Heritage Sanctuary, The King Center (which includes biographical exhibits on Dr. King and Coretta Scott King, Rosa Parks, and Mahatma Gandhi), Historic Fire Station No. 6,  the King Birth Home, the Historic Residential Area and the National Park Visitor Center.  Dr. King is widely celebrated for his oratory prowess, his work in the American Civil Rights Movement as a strategist and his tireless purpose of peace.  He was the youngest person to ever receive the Nobel Peace Prize at the time.

The federal holiday of Dr. King has turned most frequently into a day of service, so I encourage you to use this day as a day of community service and giving  with your family.

If you are searching for resources for songs and stories for the day, I recommend the following:

For stories, try the story “Impressions” over at  Sparkle Stories.  This story should be up on Monday.  I believe telling stories from your own heart are the best and in keeping with Dr. King’s amazing oration, but there are amazing  picture books regarding Dr. King.   For picture books, I like the book “The Cart That Carried Martin” (pre-read, it is about his funeral) and  the book “I Have A Dream”.  I also have been looking at the book, “Love Will See You Through” (for older children).

For music, I love the spirituals:  Yonder Come Day; Swing Low, Sweet Chariot, Go Down Moses; Hold On; Ain’t Gonna Let Nobody Turn Me Around.

If you are searching for more regarding the impulse of Martin Luther King Jr in light of Waldorf Education and the work of Rudolf Steiner, I recommend AnthroMama’s  post from 2009.

I would love to hear your family’s traditions for this holiday.

Blessings and love,
Carrie

 

 

 

 

The January Book Box

These are the books we are diving into this month.  I hope to hear what you are reading to your children, too!

(For those of you home educating with Waldorf Education, please do remember that small winter verses are sufficient up to four years of age or longer and then simple little told stories.  You can look up back posts to see the progression of verses and nursery rhymes to repetitive stories to longer stories to eventually longer stories, simple books and chapter books.  There is a progression, so know this list is intended for those searching, but not necessarily for all of these to be read at one time to a child  no matter what age! You are the expert on your family!)

Seasonal Festivals/ Spiritual:

  • The Christmas Story Book, published by Floris Books – stories up to Epiphany divided by age.
  • St. Seraphim’s Beatitudes:  Blessings for Our Path to Heaven by Priest Daniel Marshall
  • The Theophany of Our Lord by Sister Elayne
  • In our house, the Anglican Communion has many wonderful Saints to recognize this month, so I keep many books on hand about these Holy Men and Women.
  • For Martin Luther King Jr. Day, I like “The Cart that Carried Martin” (look at the Amazon review and leave out the inaccurate line); “Love Will See You Through” (I would put it for older children myself than the reviews indicate); and many more wonderful books.  Go to your local library and browse and see what resonates with you and your family.

Seasonal/Winter:

  • Grandmother Winter by Phyllis Root
  • The Snowy Day by Ezra Jack Keats
  • Snow by Roy McKie and P.D. Eastman
  • The Biggest, Best Snowman by Margery Cuyler
  • Winter by Gerda Muller
  • Snow by Uri Shulevitz
  • Katy and the Big Snow by Virginia Lee Burton
  • Snow Princess by Susan Paradis
  • Sun Bread by Elisa Kleven (and bake some bread!)
  • The Story of the Snow Children by Sibylle von Offers
  • Red Sled by Patricia Thomas
  • Winter is the Warmest Season by Lauren Stringer (I really like this book).
  • The Mitten by Jan Brett
  • The Hat by Jan Brett
  • Winter Eyes: Poems and Paintings by Florian

Seasonal/Nature:

  • Winter on the Farm (My First Little House Books)
  • The Big Snow by Berta and Elmer Hader
  • Owl Moon by Jane Yolen
  • Cub’s Big World by Sarah Thompson

Winter Tales, for older children:

  • The Polar Bear Son:  An Inuit Tale by Lydia Dabcovitch
  • A Promise Is A Promise by Robert Munsch and Michael Kusugak
  • The Eskimo Twins by Lucy Fitch Perkins
  • A Day On Skates by Hilda van Stockum

I would love to hear what you are reading!

Blessings,
Carrie

 

2016

The most beautiful day is today, and the most beautiful moment is now.  What I love most about New Year’s Day is this promise, this idea, that every ordinary moment is special and worthy of appreciation and gratitude as we revel in the beginnings, the newness, the now.  Whether you are where you want to be or not, whether there is chaos in your life now or not, or if you feel you are on the verge of some new endeavor or change, I want you to know I am extending my thoughts of contentment and thankfulness for right where you are and the journey you are on.

We were out hiking this afternoon, but this morning I spent a little time drawing  three concentric circles on a small piece of paper and just thinking.  The first circle I drew was small and had words in it that represented the values and things that really inspire my deepest self, such as my husband and my children, and my “word of the year”.   The next circle that I drew around this inner circle had all the aspects of self-care that I really want to focus on in order to stay connected with this truth for myself.

The third circle outside of this second circle had all the communities that I am involved in, all the things that I care so deeply about, and reminds me  that I can take better care of  things when I remember and connect with my own values and inspiration and when I take care of myself.  And lastly, outside all three circles, were the “big” things that I hope to impact across the whole country and world – bringing development into parenting, bringing development into education through Waldorf methodology and current neuroscience.

Who will you impact this year?  How will you shine in your corner of the world?  I can’t wait to hear!

Blessings and love,

Carrie