Mealtimes: Eight Facets Of A Healthy Family Culture

Bless, O Lord, this food to our use and us to Thy service

And make us ever mindful of Thy many blessings

Amen

(Blessing from my husband’s side of the family)

Father, we thank Thee for this food before us

Give us strength to do Thy will

Guide and protect us in Thy heavenly path

For Christ’s sake

Amen

(Blessing from my side of the family)

Mealtimes are a vital place to slow down, to bring together different traditions from your side of the family and your partner’s side of the family, to protect and nurture and linger together.

Studies show interesting connections between children’s behavior and whether or not they ate family meals.  Many studies show, for example, Continue reading

Lovely Weekend Reading

 

A list of encouraging things to say to your children:  http://parentingfromscratch.wordpress.com/2012/01/12/encouraging-things-to-say-to-kids/

 

Lessons about parenting from Nancy Mohrbacher on her son’s 30th birthday:  http://www.nancymohrbacher.com/blog/2010/10/15/process-product-and-personal-growth.html

 

…and I thank Lisa Boisvert-Mackenzie for choosing to interview me for her Wonder of Childhood magazine…http://thewonderofchildhood.com/2012/01/carrie-dendtler-of-the-parenting-passageway/

 

Many blessings for your weekend,

Carrie

Simple Is Enough

I had two great conversations the other day, one with a dear friend about the challenges this particular generation of children is facing.  Her theory as to why children have more sensory challenges, obesity, attention deficit – in other words, why are these children so darn unhealthy – is, in her mind, a mixture of things:  environment, too much stimulation, schedules that are like an adult, too much of making the child a miniature adult, diet, lack of physical work and movement.

Then I had another conversation, this time with a dear friend and physical therapy colleague.  She is in geriatrics, but specifically wondered why she is seeing more and more dementia and Alzheimer’s-type symptoms in patients of even younger ages than before.  “The people I am seeing, HAD those kinds of childhoods that you wish for – eating local, farm-raised food before agribusiness became huge, collecting eggs and walking to school, playing outside for hours on end in rivers and creeks and the mountainside.  So why are these folks getting dementia at such a relatively young age?”

Of course, no one knows for sure; these are the kind of rhetorical things physical therapists and I am sure other health care professionals sit around and ponder.  We all wonder.

I am sure it is all the things of childhood, but also mixed with all the things of adulthood:  taking adults who were used to moving a lot to moving them into jobs that were more sitting than usual, more modern conveniences than ever that also cause decreased movement, a more toxic environment, an increasingly over-stimulating environment ( the friend from my first conversation was remarking that now when you go into a grocery store, there may be TV’s in the shopping cart, cows mooing in the diary section, dancing vegetables with loud thunder that mists over the veggies!  How true!)

But I think it is also community – or lack thereof.  The church or synagogue may not be the same hub of the neighborhood it once was, which is a shame for many reasons and on many levels but also on a health level:  one six year study showed Continue reading

Thank You–Top Referrers of 2011!

 

I wanted to thank the top 15 referrers to The Parenting Passageway for 2011, and I do hope my readers will check out these blogs and websites.  They are fabulous!

 

www.bendingbirches2010.blogspot.com  

www.catherine-et-les-fees.blogspot.com

www.mothering.com 

www.simplicityparenting.com

www.thewaldorfconnection.com

www.simplekids.net

www.ecomilf.com

www.picklebums.com

www.ancienthearth2.blogspot.com

www.localgrain.org

www.pinkandgreenmama.blogspot.com

www.flowingwithmyducklings.blogspot.com

www.blumieboys.blogspot.com

www.jeefamily.blogspot.com

www.hiddendell.blogspot.com

 

My sincerest gratitude to all of my referrers, and to  all of you whom read The Parenting Passageway.  A most blessed New Year’s to you all.

Carrie

January Plans For The Parenting Passageway

 

Here is a sneak preview for end of the year/January 2012 plans for The Parenting Passageway!

 

We will be finishing up our chapter by chapter look at “The Well-Balanced Child” and starting our NEW book, “The Seven Principles For Making Marriage Work:  A Practical Guide from the Country’s Foremost Relationship Expert” by John M Gottman, PhD and Nan Silver.  Dr. Gottman has, in 91 percent of the couples he has studied in three separate studies, predicted whether that couple’s marriage would succeed or fail.  This fascinating book was a NY Times best-seller and you can buy used copies so cheaply on Amazon or get it through your local library.  Here is the Amazon link:  http://www.amazon.com/Seven-Principles-Making-Marriage-Work/dp/0609805797/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1325018006&sr=8-1

 

In January, we will also be taking a look at what I see as the foundation of successful homeschooling and parenting:  inner work and personal development, religion and the creation of family culture.  I have eight facets of family culture in mind to look at with you all in a very special series that I hope will get everyone thinking about providing a mindful vision for their own family life.

 

I will also be continuing the virtual tea regarding the pillars of Waldorf Education with Lisa Boisvert-Mackenzie at Celebrating the Rhythm of Life/ Wonder of Childhood and with other bloggers who would like to join in.  Here is the link to Lisa’s latest tea post:  http://www.celebratetherhythmoflife.com/2011/12/lemniscate-and-senses.html

 

Many blessings,

Carrie

Ideas to Celebrate Christmastide

This post today celebrates some of the traditional ways Christmastide has been celebrated with the Christian faith.  Therefore, many of these ideas may be familiar to many of my Christian readers, but I think there are many things to sort through and use to celebrate the Twelve Holy Nights even if you are not Christian and would just like to mark this special time. These can be peaceful and holy days, truly to slow down, to fast from media and screens and to enjoy the simple pleasures marked the traditions of the Church.

Here is a small guide toward helping families enjoy each day of Christmastide, and I do so hope you will leave your favorite traditions in the comment box as well!

Saturday, December 24th – Since the Feast of the Nativity truly begins on Christmas Eve, attending liturgy is a priority for this night! In the hustle and bustle that can often accompany this day before Christmas, making time for quiet prayer is a powerful example of showing our children that God is with us should we choose to acknowledge Him, find Him, adore Him. God is with us, and with His smallest creatures. In Scandinavian countries, it is traditional to put sheaves of wheat for the birds. Children will enjoy taking time on this day to decorate an outside tree for the birds by stringing popcorn or making the traditional pine cone bird feeder of peanut butter rolled in birdseed.

 

Sunday, December 25th– Christmas Day, the first of the twelve holy days, is a wonderful time to take an afternoon walk and see God’s creation, and also to read from The Gospel of Saint Luke. Old-fashioned board games are another suggestion for celebrating the Christmas afternoon in family togetherness.

 

Another suggestion that some Christian families have tried with success is to spread gift-giving throughout the twelve days of Christmas so that not every gift is opened on Christmas morning.

 

Monday, December 26th The Feast of St. Stephen – Continue reading

A Message For the 2011 Twelve Holy Nights

This is such a special time of year for me.  As a Christian, the season of Christmas starts on Christmas Day and extends through January 5th, and then we move into the season of Epiphany.  This time of year, for me, is one of the major times of the year when I am off the computer, I spend more time thinking and dreaming and planning.  I spend time connecting with what vision I want to create for the coming year, and spend lots of time with family and friends and being outside in nature.  It is lovely.

In the past, I have chosen a focus of inner work personal to me, much like what Lynn Jericho does, to work really work off an inspiration for these twelve holy days. In the past I have worked with being easy with myself, one year I worked with “letting go”, one year I worked with love, one year I worked with “no comment”.   This year, I have been feeling especially inspired by this passage from Brother Victor-Antoine D’avila-LaTourrette in the book, “A Monastery Journey to Christmas”, which runs through Candlemas on February 2nd: “We can only find peace and calmness within the confines of our own selves.  Inner peace is a gift from the Lord.  Let us beseech him day and night for his gift.  And let us help him by cultivating actively all those things that lead to inner peace.  Like the angels on that first Christmas night, let us pray and work for peace on earth.”  How can I be a part of peace this year – peace in my heart, peace in my home, peace in my community, peace in the world?

There are some resources out there to help you celebrate the Holy Nights. Continue reading

A Christmas Mood

The excitement in the air is palpable for the children; the gifts, the tree, the relatives, the food, oh my!  There is a definitive mood in the air, and it is one (hopefully) of good will and cheer.  An idea that the world is a good place.

This is a mood that children  in our society need more than ever:  that the world is a good place, the people in the world are good, and that my own little personal world is stable and good.

Maybe this holiday you are facing times that are not “so good.”  Divorce, financial crisis, housing crisis, illness, death in the family  all conspire to make the Christmas mood disappear.

Do not let it.  Part of being human and being an adult means we have the ability to strive, to rise up, to not let our circumstances define us but to allow us to define our circumstances.

As we come also to a close of another year, I can only leave you with this parting thought:  do not be the reaction to circumstances this coming year; be the visionary and shape your world.  What you cannot shape, call on your faith, remain strong, do the right things even when no one else is, and be someone who is proactive.  Be the goodness, and carry that Christmas mood in your heart for your children.

Many blessings, and Merry Christmas my friends,

Carrie

Guest Post: A Gentle Santa Lucia Story by Tiziana Boccaletti

There was a gentle Santa Lucia story by Tiziana Boccaletti on the Our Little Nature Nest blog.  Since that blog has been taken private, I asked Tiziana if she would be willing to share this sweet Santa Lucia story here so families could find and share it with their own loved ones.  Tiziana generously agreed, and here is her story: Continue reading

A Lovely Holiday Giveaway!

I am so indebted to all of my wonderful readers.  You all really touch my heart, I carry so many of you into my prayers and my life.  I appreciate all of your patience as I answer every email personally and sometimes run a bit behind.  Thank you so much for reading this blog and sharing your lives with me.

For all of you in this wonderful season of quiet anticipation, I have a very special giveaway from Sparkle Stories.  Some of my readers are familiar with Sparkle Stories.  They are gentle  audio adventures written by a wonderful husband and wife team who are a Waldorf teacher and storyteller and a playwright, respectively.

Many families do not provide visual or audio stories to their children, and I applaud that, especially for very small children.   However, some families are transitioning from visual screen time to audio stories only, and some families are searching for gentle stories for their children to enjoy at  very special times.  In this vein, Sparkle Stories could be a welcome fit for this purpose.

Sparkle Stories writes:  Continue reading