Today we are up to common discipline challenges and responses for our terrific ten year olds! Our last post about the nine-year-old and the nine year change, can be found here.
Gentle discipline is the mainstay of parenting life, because it encompasses guiding and validating the authentic spiritual being that is every human being and child. It is a mindset to live by and parent by, and if you can master some of these techniques, you will find yourself even having more positive communication and conflict resolution with other adults. In Part Two of this series, we focused on birth through age 4. In Part Three we looked at ages five and six and in Part Four at the ages of six and seven. The mainstay of gentle discipline for these years begins with our own inner work and development, as discussed in Part One of this series.
As a quick recap of development up until this point, birth through age four encompasses a time of protection, physical movement, warmth and trust and love in a caregiver and in a good world. The ending of this stage sees the use of the words “I” and “no” NOT as an act of defiance or disobedience, but as growth into individuality. Ages five and six also sees the same importance of protection, physical movement, warmth, and love and trust in a caregiver continue but play and social experiences now expands during these years. Ages seven and eight see a dichotomy in developmental outlook, with seven often being more insecure, wailing, gloomy; a time of feeling the world is unfair and eight taking the bull by the horns with brash boasting and exaggerated tall tales. The nine year old is in a time of great change in the inner life of the child, typically with a more insecure and inward gesture. The ten year old typically is in a smoother stage of childhood development with a niceness, goodness and friendliness about him or her. Usually ten year olds love their family very much, love activities and outings, and they typically don’t resist too much what you ask them to do; a fairly happy age. The challenges parents write to me about their ten year olds are as follows: Continue reading