The Six-Year-Old Waldorf Kindergarten Year At Home

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As you may have guessed by reading through the previous three posts regarding the six-year-old, I am a big proponent of not starting academics during the six-year-old year while the children are in a time of developmental crisis. Within the Waldorf system, most six-year-olds should still be in their last year of Kindergarten.

However, with this age often comes problems for parents who perceive that their children are wanting “more” and needing more.  Many parents equate this “wanting more” with needing more academic work.

I disagree and offer you some alternatives in this post for what to do with your child during their six-year-old year, their last year of kindergarten:

First and foremost, they need to be outside and connected to nature during all types of weather this year.  They need to be outside every day possible to burn off that restless energy that often pervades the age of six.  There is a rather popular post on this blog about connecting children to nature if you need ideas. (see https://theparentingpassageway.com/2008/11/24/connecting-your-children-to-nature/ for that post; it is one of the highest hit posts on here!).    Some Waldorf teachers also feel that daily nature walks are important for children who are weak in their physical and etheric bodies.

Secondly, they need opportunity for real work that hopefully will involve physical energy expenditure.  Do you need a pile of rocks moved?  A great job for a six-year-old!  Do you need the pile of firewood moved from one place to another?  Think creatively about what could be done around your house, your land, your yard,  that is REAL WORK.  Many six-year-olds go through a crisis of play, so do think about work they could do.  Woodworking, to make something real and functional, also comes to mind.

Thirdly, they need a strong rhythm, longer and more involved stories and more involved projects.  Think about things that involve several days to complete – modeling something, then painting.  Finger knitting and then attaching that finger knitting to something to complete a project.  What could you and your six-year-old do with a very large box?  Make  a barn, a spaceship, a house – something that, again, involves multiple steps over multiple days.

Fourth, think about games that involve strategy.  We played a lot of checkers, Battleship, card games, Junior Monopoly, Mancala and other games during my eldest’s six-year-old year.

Fifth, think about gross motor skills.  At home, you can work with your child on riding a bike without training wheels if they cannot do that yet, jump roping, using stilts,  using scissors to cut snowflakes and paper chains of figures to develop fine motor skills and threading needles and tying knots also comes to mind for fine motor skills.

Sixth, is there any way your six-year-old could help someone else?  Some parents feel strongly their six-year-old should not be exposed, say, to residents in a nursing home or such because it is hard to explain in simple terms why we have such a thing in our society.  I personally wonder what is wrong with us that we segregate our elders away from our young people, but perhaps my perspective comes from being raised by my grandparents and having my great-grandmother also live with us.  Some Waldorf Kindergartners actually seek out having a relationship with a nursing facility of some sort.

Perhaps  there is a way your six-year-old could serve within your own family, within your neighborhood (does your neighborhood plant bulbs or flowers or such with the changing seasons?  Could you and your family help?)  Could you bake cookies for elderly neighbors and deliver them?  Make May Baskets on May Day for neighbors?

Seventh, work on social skills in a more direct way – it is okay now to do this!  Not a guilt-trip laden, wordy way but a matter-of-fact way – “We wait to speak.” “You may have this when I am done.” Those sorts of things. For bossy, often drama-laden six, these are valuable skills indeed.  You are working out of more than imitation now – the seven-year-old works out of a picture of authority and you are transitioning to that.  For those of you who put the cart before the horse and have been using these direct words for a long time, please do not beat yourself up over it.  Do remember, however, that the six-year-old may need direct words and authority at some times, but still need arms around them and re-direction with fantasy and movement at other times.

Eighth, work on festival experiences.  Has your six-year-old ever made a sword and shield for Michaelmas?  Gone on a Lantern Walk for Martinmas?  Made Advent crafts in any capacity?  Dipped candles for Candlemas? Made Easter or Spring crafts?  May Day Baskets?  There are many wonderful festival books out there with lots of ideas to try!

Try to enjoy this year.  A year without being tied into main lesson time, main lesson blocks, main lesson books.  A year of wonderful experiences with lots of time to enjoy each other.  This last year of kindergarten is really the best!!

With love,

Carrie

The Six Year Old: An Anthroposophical View

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We peeked at a traditional view of the six-year-old child in one of our last posts and now it is time to look at the Waldorf view of the six-year-old.

Six is obviously the end of one seven-year-cycle and at the cusp of beginning a new seven-year-cycle.  It is also traditionally the time the child should be in the last year of Kindergarten within the Waldorf school system and getting ready to transfer over to the first grade by the age of six and a half or seven. I have heard lately of Waldorf schools transitioning early six-year-olds into first grade and feel this is incredibly wrong.  Just wrong!  From a traditional point of view it makes no sense at all; Gesell Institute is pretty firm about what a rocky age this can be, it is an age already full of tensional outlets and all kinds of misery, they are firm that it is a terrible age for teaching numbers and letters and writing, most six-year-olds can’t sit still to save their own lives – so yes, by all means, let’s throw academics into the picture!  That make perfect sense from a developmental standpoint!  And, from a Waldorf standpoint, it makes even LESS sense to have an early six-year-old in the first grade.  I have two more posts to write in this series about the six-year-old – one about peaceful living with a six-year-old, and one is going to be about what to do that last year of Waldorf  homeschooling kindergarten,  so stay tuned!  I feel very passionate about the little six-year-old! Okay, done with my rant now…….

Back to the anthroposophical viewpoint of the six-year-old. 

In Waldorf Circles, this time is often called the “first puberty” or “first adolescence”.  The book “You’re Not the Boss of Me!  Understanding the Six/Seven-Year-Old Transformation”, edited by Ruth Ker, mentions some of the following characteristics:

  • The appearance of the permanent teeth are seen as a more obvious and outward sign of all the things going on internally with the child.
  • The six-year-old year is a time when the etheric of the child begins to separate from the parent.  If you are confused about what etheric means or have forgotten, please do go back to the post about “Peaceful Life With a Four-Year-Old” – that explains the fourfold human being and may be helpful to you.
  • For the first time, thinking and feeling are just as strong as the will in the child.
  • This is seen in Waldorf circles NOT as the time to provide adult intellectual reasoning, more complex explanation but to instead latch on to the child’s sense of fantasy and imagination.
  • Steiner wrote that children at the change of teeth need “soul milk” from us; Ruth Ker has interpreted this to mean authenticity.
  • Children race around, have frenzied movements, and seek out plenty of movement.
  • The child’s limbs begin to lengthen, body fat begins to disappear, waistlines become present, formation of the “S” shape of the spinal curve.
  • The children of this age enjoy physical challenge and enjoy work
  • This may be a crisis time of play where the child literally cannot play.
  • Children of this age are working  to develop symmetry, balance, dominance, crossing over midline – still!
  • Children of this age want to be the boss.  They are bossy, they correct people (including parents!)
  • They may try to “play” with “adult” themes that are not so lovely to us – weddings, drinking, trying to get others to do things that are not right, rhymes with off-color words and phrases, being silly and giggly. The word “hate” enters the vocabulary now.
  • You may see play that excludes other children.
  • A six-year-old plays with boundaries.

 

Of course, with some of these children, these behavior do not show up until age seven (hence the title the six/SEVEN-year-old transformation) and some children may hit it early, but these are some general characteristics of this age from a Waldorf perspective.

In our next post we will look at what to do to guide these behavior and be an Authentic Leader.  If you need inspiration until then, do hit the “No Spanking” tag in the tag box and that will bring up the series of posts I wrote about being an Authentic Leader.

Until next time,

Carrie

Things I Learned Along the Way in Teaching Homeschool Waldorf First Grade

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Well, now that we are more than half way through our first grade year, I thought I would re-cap a few things I have learned and discovered; maybe they will resonate with you as you either plan for first grade or finish first grade up this Spring.

1.  There cannot be enough Form Drawing.  I planned three form drawing blocks plus weekly form drawing most months; it is that important.  I highly suggest that you start First Grade with an entire MONTH of Form Drawing.  There is a post on this blog about Form Drawing; please refer to that for further details. 

2.  You simply must plan handwork a certain number of times a week or it will may not happen; your child may love to knit but mine did not.  We worked essentially on a row a day every day in knitting and we are still behind completing the number of projects she probably would have completed by now in a Waldorf school.  This fact does not really bother me, she does beautiful and careful work and I feel certain by next year she will enjoy knitting when she doesn’t have to think so hard about it, LOL.

3.  Which brings me to my third point – sometimes your little one will balk and YOU have to know when to take the day off and go hiking, when to allow play with the siblings,and when to say, “No, really, this has to happen today.  Back to work, please.”

4.  You can imbue many opportunities for nature and ecological study throughout the curriculum.  We kept a gardening day due to my kindergartner and I think next year I may expand this to twice a week in our rhythm instead of once; I also planned nature blocks in with Form Drawing and we also did Nature Blocks in January with the The Year/The Four Seasons and a Backyard Nature Block.  I hope to write a post on the Waldorf way of teaching Science in the future; it is fascinating!  As a science person, I totally appreciate it!

5.  The story of the letters can be taught in many different ways through the use of a container story to hold the fairy tales together.  This was helpful as I made up something that spoke to my daughter, a story with fairies and princesses that also involved some spiritual elements as well.  Think of what truly speaks to your child and work that in.

6.  Wet-on-wet watercolor painting is important, and it is great fun to alternate this with modeling.  We painted twice a week and modeled two to three times a week. 

7.  Math is one of those subjects that people tend to put in a secondary position versus reading; but please do not be fooled.  Math is of the utmost importance; Eugene Schwartz is convinced that there are periods of math windows for math literacy.  I think it is important once you do your initial math block to practice every day you do school where that is not the main lesson focus (with a few breaks here and there for holiday crafting and  such).  Math is one of those subjects that works whole to parts, that needs to build in the child.  Please keep working on it.

8.  Please do not neglect the fun things- festival preparation, crafts, projects.  Don’t forget that the “head” part of your main  lesson can be totally hands-on.  Today we did the Grimms’ fairy tale “The Pink” and drew a huge, as tall as my daughter mural of the castle/tower from the story.  We also wet-on-wet watercolor painted ‘the pink” (a flower) from the story.  Tomorrow we will use our third day of this story to draw giant P’s on the driveway with chalk, walk them, hop them, draw them on each other,  and finally draw them in our  Main Lesson Book.

9.  We waited to start our “blowing instrument” as Steiner called it (we have been using a pennywhistle this year) until after the New Year.  You really don’t have to do it all at once; we did however bring in a lot of singing throughout the school year. We learn at least two new songs or more a month, and often make up repetitive songs to go with the fairy tales or the season.  Think how you can bring music into your homeschool!  Steiner talked about how the seven-to-fourteen-year old learns best through rhythm, so thinking about how to bring this to your child is so important.

Just a couple of things from along the way; if you are finishing First Grade please your nuggets of wisdom in the Comment Box to share and help other mothers just like you!

Carrie

A Book for Parents of the Five-to-Seven-Year-Old

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I recommend this book time and time again to parents, so now you will know about this secret gem as well:  “You’re Not the Boss of Me! Understanding the Six/Seven Year Transformation” with Ruth Ker as the Editor.

This book was borne out of a question Ruth Ker from the Sunrise School in Duncan, British Columbia had:  were Waldorf Kindergartens truly meeting the needs of the older Kindergarten students?  (Recall that five and six year olds are typically still in Kindergarten, with First Grade starting closer to seven years of age in accordance with Steiner’s views on the seven year cycles of life).  This book contains a series of articles written by teachers, doctors and parents of Kindergarten children.

This is the Table of Contents:

Foreword, Susan Howard

Introduction, Ruth Ker

Section One Picture of the Six/Seven Year Old Change

Observations of the Six-Year-Old Change, Ruth Ker

The Birth of the Etheric, Nancy Blanning

Dentition: A Mirror of the Child’s Development, Helge Ruof and Jorg Ruof

Seeing the Wholeness of the Child, Nancy Blanning

Is Our Educational System Contributing to Attentional and Learning Difficulties in Our Children?, Susan R. Johnson

Section Two:  Meeting the Challenge – The Role of the Teacher

Old Man Trouble, Tim Bennett

Our Role in  Meeting the Children, Barbara Kloeck

Soul Milk, Ruth Ker

Essential Oil Baths, Louise deForest

Extract from Work and Play in Childhood, Freya Jaffke

Section Three:  Building the Social Fabric of a Mixed-Age Kindergarten

You Can’t Play With Me, Barbara Kloeck

The Six-Year-Old in a Mixed-Age Kindergarten, Laurie Clark

The Raft, Louise deForest

The Little Ones in the Classroom, Barbara Kloeck

Girls and Boys- Feminine and Masculine, Louise deForest

Beer and Lollipops, Melissa  Borden

Section Four:  Meeting the Child’s Needs- Suggestions for Working in the Classroom

A Working Kindergarten, Louise deForest

Creating A Flow In Time, Barbara Klocek

Sailing Our Ship in Fair or Stormy Weather, Tim Bennett

The Daily Blessing of the Older Child in the Kindergarten, Ruth Ket

Movement Journeys: Enticing the Older Child to Intentional Movement, Nancy Blanning

The Role of Handwork, Barbara Klocek

Little Red-Cap:  The Overcoming of Heredity and the Birth of the Individual, Louise deForest

Section Five:  Activities and Resources for the Classroom

Mother Goose Movement Journey, Nancy Blanning

Through the Snow:  A Winter Movement Journey, Nancy Blannning

Briar Rose Circle, Janet Kellman, after the Brothers Grimm

The Gnomes, Janet Kellman

Star Money, Elisabeth Moore-Haas, adapted by Ruth Ker

The Magic Lake at the End of the World, adapted by Barbara Klocek

The Pumpkin Child, submitted by Ruth Ker

The Legend of the Babouschka, adapted by Ruth Ker

Activity Ideas for Older Children in the Kindergarten, compiled by Nancy Blanning and Ruth Ker

Transitional Games, Verses, and Songs, compiled by Barbara Klocek and Ruth Ker

Jump Rope Rhymes, compiled by Barbara Klocek and Ruth Ker

Section Six:  Parents As Partners

Waldorf Education for the Child and the Parent, Devon Brownsey

Working with Parents:Ideas for Parent Meetings, Ruth Ker and Nancy Blanning

A Bouquet of Wishes for the Rosemary Kindergarten, Tim Bennett

Meetings with Parents on the Topic of Discipline, Louise deForest

Working with the Will of the Young Child, Nancy Blanning

How to Get the Young Child to Do What You Want Without Talking Yourself to Death, Nancy Blanning

Handouts for Parents, Susan R. Johnson, MD including:

The Importance of Warmth

The Importance of Breakfast

The Importance of Sleep

The Meaning of Illness

Fever

The Earache

Parenting a Young Child-What My Formal Education Never Taught Me

Confronting Our Shadow

Product vs. Process

Notes on the Contributors

References

This is a great book and all the articles should be required reading for the parent of the five-to-seven-year old.  This book definitely belongs on your bookshelf as a wonderful reference to be turned to again and again.

Happy Reading,

Carrie

The Snazzy Six-Year-Old

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Ah, six.  The beginning of the six/seven year transformation as described in Waldorf circles, and judged even by traditional childhood development experts as the age that is completely different than the other ages before it.

This is also the age where many parents I have spoken with feel a bit of despair, as if all of their good parenting up until this point was in vain, because now their six-year-old is “defiant”, “physically aggressive”, “mouthy and disrespectful”, “good in school but terrible at home”, “drama over everything and anything”.  Tensional outlets, sexual play and the ilk that signifies significant disequilibrium is back, only it seems worse to parents at this point because after all, six is the age of schooling and being grown-up, not like when the child was two or four.

Hhhmmm.

I urge you to strongly consider six the way Waldorf circles view the age of six – a transitional phase as the child moves into the grades at school and into a new seven-year-cycle.  I urge you to look carefully at the traditional and anthroposophical behavioral characteristics of this age so you do not over- react to this age.

Let’s start with a quick quote from The Gesell Institute’s “Your Six-Year-Old”:

“Your typical Six-year-old is a paradoxical little person, and bipolarity is the name of his game.  Whatever he does, he does the opposite just as readily.  In fact, sometimes just the choice of some certain object or course of action immediately triggers an overpowering need for its opposite.

The Six-year-old is wonderfully complex and intriguing, but life can be complicated for him at times, and what he needs most in the world is parents who understand him.  For Six is not just bigger and better than Five. He is almost entirely different.  He is different because he is changing, and changing rapidly.  Though many of the changes are for the good – he is, obviously, growing more mature, more independent, more daring, more adventurous- this is not necessarily an easy time for the child.”

Typical Developmental Characteristics of the Six-Year-Old, Traditional Perspective

  • Usually ambivalent, wants two opposite things and cannot make up mind
  • Frequent reversals of numbers and letters (The Gesell Institute says that six is NOT the age to do formal teaching of reading at home or at school.  So why the United States school system is so heavily focused on this, I do not know!)
  • Stubborn, hard to make up his mind about things but once his mind is made up it is difficult to get child to change his mind
  • Adores his mother, but at the same time,when things go wrong it is usually Mother’s fault and the Six year-old will take out everything on their Mother.
  • The child is now the center of their own universe; the Mother is not the center of the child’s universe – the six-year-old wants to be close to Mother but at the same time wants to be independent so there is conflict, ambivalence in this relationship but also increased growth and maturity
  • The Six-year-old wants to win, wants to have everything
  • Worries about everything as he moves to be separate from his mother
  • Can be violent, loud, demanding, expects perfection from parents – but not to be “bad”, mainly because he is anxious to be first, to be loved the most, to be the best. (In other words, a very insecure age).
  • Insecure, and high emotional needs.
  • Cannot bear to accept criticism, or bear to lose.  Very small failures, small comments or criticisms hurt them deeply.
  • Cries a lot about physical hurts.
  • Lots of enthusiasm, loves to ask questions, loves to be read to.
  • Can be very happy, warm, full of laughs and smiles.

TYPICAL DEVELOPMENTAL CHARACTERISTICS OF THE SIX-AND-A-HALF To SEVEN-YEAR-OLD, TRADITIONAL PERSPECTIVE

  • Increased equilibrium
  • Lively intellectuality
  • Amusing, has a good sense of humor
  • “A certain maturity”
  • Loves new places, new things, new ideas
  • Enjoys life

 

Many parents I have spoken with found early six to be fine, and some of the characteristics that the Gesell Institute describes not to come in until six-and-a-half.  Like so many things in life, your child’s own individuality plays into all this.

Some Further Characteristics of the Six-Year-Old:

TEACHERS:  If the child attends school, the teacher is well-liked, well-respected, what the teacher does is right,  typically the child behaves well in school (but may fall apart at home).

SIBLINGS:  Most six-year-olds are  not at their best with younger siblings.  May enjoy teaching a younger sibling things, but overall may be very competitive, combative (I personally think though that this has much to do with the age of the younger child, although Gesell does not seem to take this into account).  Tends to be very jealous of any attention or objects given a brother or sister.  May argue, tease, bully, frighten, torment, get angry or hit siblings, according to The Gesell Institute.

FRIENDS:  Friends mean a lot to children of this age, but again, it is often hard for the six-year-old to get along with friends.  “Children of this age tend to be very aggressive both verbally and physically.  They are also quarrelsome, belligerent, boisterous, argumentative, excitable, emotional.”  Six wants to “boss and win.”  Usually very little sense of humor with their friends, finds it hard to forgive.

EATING:  May stuff mouth with food, talk with mouth full, grab for food, knock over his milk, dribble, kick chair leg, teeter and totter in chair, fall off chair.

Tends to eat very slowly, but likes to eat and may eat all day long.

SLEEPING: Usually goes to bed well, naps are done, child ready for bed by seven o-clock or eight o’clock according to Gesell Institute.  Most sleep through night well.

TENSIONAL OUTLETS:  At a high:  wriggling, kicking, and swinging arms, sharp verbal comments to outright temper tantrums. Biting and tearing of fingernails, scratching, grimacing, grinding teeth, chewing pencils, nose picking are all common tensional outlets as well.  Child is generally restless,

HEALTH/PHYSICAL ABILITIES:  Child suddenly very clumsy.  May have many complaints about physical health, even when not sick.  Allergies are high, mucous membranes are frequently sensitive and inflamed, communicable diseases are at a high, scalp very sensitive to brushing, child tires easily and fatigues easily.  Baby teeth may fall out and secondary teeth may come in.

SEX PLAY:  Also at a high, just like at age four.

SENSITIVITY TO CLOTHES:  Usually peaking at six and seven years of age.

That’s a quick view of child development at this age from the Gesell book; there is much more in this book and I highly recommend you buy this book and have it on your bookshelf for reference.  It can be found very cheaply used on Amazon and it well worth the price!

Our next posts will look at the anthroposophic view of the six-year-old and then at how to have a peaceful life with a six-year-old, and what homeschooling a six-year-old in Waldorf homeschool kindergarten may look like.

Happy reading until next time,

Carrie

Teaching A Foreign Language in Waldorf Homeschool

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In most Waldorf schools, two languages are started in Kindergarten.  Many times the two languages taught are languages that are in linguistic opposition so to speak, for example,  a Romance Language and a Germanic language other than English, or a Romance Language and a Slavic Language.

This is a link that discusses the cognitive and academic benefits to learning a foreign language:

http://www.utm.edu/departments/french/flsat.html

This talks directly about that memory storage theory (and debunks it).  It also looks at current research, including the fact that kids who know a foreign language score higher in the SAT’s, typically do better in mathematics. actually have  (good) changes in the grey matter of the brain and that people who know foreign languages may be less likely to develop Alzheimer’s…

Interesting stuff with lots of links to research.

In our family, many of our friends are European and all of them speak 3 or 4 languages – Dutch, Greek, French, German, English.  We also have many friends who speak Spanish and English.  Languages are important in our family, I guess because of all of our family friends and because my husband has lived all over the world when he was growing up – Korea, Germany.  He is still  pretty much is open to moving anywhere in the world. 

I do speak Spanish, not like a native, but enough to communicate,  read, negotiate services I need, talk to my patients and friends…not fluent, but probably a high medium kind of speaker.  However, we still have a Spanish tutor for our children. The tutor is a completely native speaker and fluent.  This is very important because while I can read to my children in Spanish and such, there are so many of the idioms and sayings that I just plain miss because I am not a native speaker.

Sometimes  if there is a homeschooling group of ANY kind in your area, those mothers may have connections to either teachers who will tutor homeschoolers.  One other place to look is to see what is the immigrant population or  heritage of the people in the town you live in is….Swedish?
Italian? German?  Perhaps there is someone within your community who would be willing to teach your child songs, verses or tell stories within any foreign language.  Is there a church in your town which holds services in another language?  That also gives you a clue as to what foreign languages you may be able to connect into where you live.

Sometimes if there is a large enough group of people in one place who speak a certain language, they may start a language/cultural center.  In my town, which is large, there is a Chinese school, a Japanese school, a Dutch school, a Swedish school, a Finnish playgroup, lots of opportunities for Spanish, at least for the pre-kindy crowd, a French school, a Russian school and a German school.  There probably are even more populations and schools than even I am aware of at this point. Even  if you do not want your child to attend the school, it may be a place  to start to see if anyone can tutor. Talk to the potential tutor  ahead of time, and explain your curriculum so they understand if they  need to bring songs and verses and stories with props or
what…Waldorf may be new to them!

Spanish is obviously a functional language in our country (USA) but
learning ANY language helps activate that part of the brain, leads to
greater cultural awareness and can spark interest in other
languages. My oldest daughter is very aware of people
speaking other languages and now she listens and wants to know what
language they speak and if she can learn that one as well!

Tutors may not be as unaffordable as you think; and I also know moms
who have worked out trades for tutoring. I also know moms who
instead of or as a holiday gift asked family members to cover
tutoring for them for a month or a certain number of months.
Typically the after school or Saturday language schools are not that
expensive for the whole year (comparatively).

The other thing to consider is while sometimes one language sounds
daunting enough, learning two languages that are rather opposite is
really great. My oldest is learning Spanish and German and they
really are nice complements – a Romance Language and a Germanic
language and I feel it will be easy for her to slide into other
Romance languages and even into the Slovak languages.   

There are many wonderful languages – African languages, Romance
languages, Germanic languages…..Sometimes I think we get stuck on
Spanish (which that would be nice to learn because of the
functionality), but there may be resources for something else in your
area as well.  Keep an open mind and see what you can find – you may be able to find for your child not only a person who can provide your child with the wonderful gift of multiple languages, but also with the great cultural awareness that we are all global neighbors.

Yours until next time,

Carrie

Childbirth in “Consumer Reports”

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This came across another list I am on, and it is so important that I wanted to share it with you all.  Please pass the permalink for this post on to any expectant families you know.

Article in “Consumer Reports” about Childbirth

http://www.consumerreports.org/health/medical-conditions-treatments/pregnancy-childbirth/maternity-care/overview/maternity-care.htm

Back to basics for safer childbirth

Too many doctors and hospitals are overusing high-tech procedures

Noninvasive measures can mean better outcomes for baby and Mom.

When it’s time to bring a new baby into the world, there’s a lot to be said for letting nature take the lead. The normal, hormone-driven changes in the body that naturally occur during delivery can optimize infant health and encourage the easy establishment and continuation of breastfeeding and mother-baby attachment. Childbirth without technical intervention can succeed in leading to a good outcome for mother and child, according to a new report. (Take our maternity-care quiz to test your knowledge:  “Evidence-Based Maternity Care: What It Is and What It Can Achieve”).

Co-authors Carol Sakala and Maureen P. Corry of the nonprofit Childbirth Connection analyzed hundreds of the most recent studies and systematic reviews of maternity care. The 70-page report was issued collaboratively by Childbirth Connection, the Reforming States Group (a voluntary association of state-level health policymakers), and Milbank Memorial Fund, and released on Oct. 8, 2008.

OVERUSE OF HIGH-TECH MEASURES

The report found that, in the U.S., too many healthy women with low- risk pregnancies are being routinely subjected to high-tech or invasive interventions that should be reserved for higher-risk pregnancies. Such measures include:

• Inducing labor. The percentage of women whose labor was induced more than doubled between 1990 and 2005

• Use of epidural painkillers, which might cause adverse effects, including rapid fetal heart rate and poor performance on newborn assessment tests

• Delivery by Caesarean section, which is estimated to account for one-third of all U.S births in 2008, which far exceed the World Health Organization’s recommended national rate of 5 to 10 percent

• Electronic fetal monitoring, unnecessarily adding to delivery costs

• Rupturing membranes (“breaking the waters”), intending to hasten onset of labor

• Episiotomy, which is often unnecessary. 

In fact, the current style of maternity care is so procedure-intensive that 6 of the 15 most common hospital procedures used in the entire U.S. are related to childbirth. Although most childbearing women in this country are healthy and at low risk for childbirth complications, national surveys reveal that essentially all women who give birth in U.S. hospitals have high rates of use of complex interventions, with risks of adverse effects.

The reasons for this overuse might have more to do with profit and liability issues than with optimal care, the report points out.

Hospitals and care providers can increase their insurance reimbursements by administering costly high-tech interventions rather than just watching, waiting, and shepherding the natural process of childbirth.

Convenience for health care workers and patients might be another factor. Naturally occurring labor is not limited to typical working hours. Evidence also shows that a disproportionate amount of tech- driven interventions like Caesarean sections occur during weekday “business hours,” rather than at night, on weekends, or on holidays.

UNDERUSE OF HIGH-TOUCH, NONINVASIVE MEASURES

Many practices that have been proven effective and do little to no harm are underused in today’s maternity care for healthy low-risk women. They include:

• Prenatal vitamins

• Use of midwife or family physician

• Continuous presence of a companion for the mother during labor

• Upright and side-lying positions during labor and delivery, which are associated with less severe pain than lying down on one’s back

• Vaginal birth (VBAC) for most women who have had a previous Caesarean section

• Early mother-baby skin-to-skin contact.

The study suggests that those and other low-cost, beneficial practices are not routinely practiced for several reasons, including limited scope for economic gain, lack of national standards to measure providers’ performance, and a medical tradition that doesn’t prioritize the measurement of adverse effects, or take them into account.

Please go to the link to access the article, and please pass this information.  Let’s change the climate of childbirth in this country!

Thanks to you all,

Carrie

More Thoughts About Waldorf Kindergarten At Home

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Some mothers who have been feeling overwhelmed in their attempt to create a Waldorf Kindergarten at home have contacted me.  I have a few thoughts on this subject.

First of all, while circle time is the heart of the Waldorf Kindergarten in a Waldorf School, I feel the heart of the Waldorf Kindergarten homeschooling experience is often the practical work we do in our homes and with our children.  To me, it is much more important to work on the rhythm of your day and your week first.  What day do you garden? What day do you bake or cook something special?  What day do you do housekeeping?

Someone asked me if regular, mundane housework was what the children were being called to participate in.  I could only share my own experience with her.  When I started trying to commit to doing things on certain days, I started with washing one day and ironing the next.  And what I discovered is that even having the children assist in sorting clothes, carrying clothes, putting clothes into the washer, hanging clothes up to dry, ironing – was just not riveting to my children, even with singing and verses involved and child-sized ironing  boards and whatnot. They would be off playing (or more often than not, rolling in all the clean laundry I was trying to fold and iron :)).  For some Waldorf families, washing and ironing works well as a weekly activity – for us it did not.  Does this mean I stopped washing and ironing? No, it just means I include it more in our daily chores that I do after breakfast – where the kids can join in if they want  or just play.

The work we do as part of the Kindergarten I do try to make special and I try to hook them in.  This may look different from family to family.  However, if you light a candle in the morning with a verse and then blow it out and do your work – whatever that may be- with a song or a story while you are doing it, and giving them opportunities to help – you may find things go better.  You will find what resonates with your own children.  In our family, we have devised weeks  where our activities by day  were wet-on-wet watercolor painting, bread baking or cooking something special, arts and crafts or festival preparation, gardening (always with stories, songs, and something a child would be more interested in than just pulling weeds for two hours!), housekeeping. This is separate from the daily chores we do around the house and yard.  Again, each family will find their own activities and what works for them may also change as their children age.

Second of all, these mothers were going nuts trying to piece together verses and stories.  I explained my thought would be to simplify.  Pick three fingerplays that reflect something going on in the seasons and stick to those for a whole month.  Have one song you learn together for the whole month that reflects something seasonal.  Pick a story and tell it for a whole month.

We recently did the story “Why the Evergreen Leaves Don’t Lose Their Leaves” for a whole month.  I just told it whenever we had story time, so perhaps three to four times a week.  However, we did lots of different things with the story to bring it to life.  We played the part of the bird and hopped around how we thought a bird with a broken wing would hop around.  We stuck green silks on our heads and played the different parts of the different trees in the story. We made birds out of beeswax to sit in a nest.  We made trees out of air-drying clay.  We took nature walks and looked for nests in the bare trees.  My oldest played her pennywhistle for the part of the wind as we added details about the weather in the story (which coincidentally reflected the weather we were experiencing outside.  Hhhmmm, how did that happen?).  We added repetitive phrases in that echoed throughout the story so by the end of the month my Kindergartner could say this phrase at the right points in the story.  We made up a song to sing as the bird walked.  We were never tired of this story,and many of these ideas came to me after I had lived the story for a few weeks.  Try it and see if this happens to you.

If you cannot memorize a story, get two sheets of watercolor paper and write the story out and put it between the covers as your special book.  But do try; you may find that just by reading the story for three nights every night before you go to bed and sleep on it that you have more memorized than you think.  Use props.  Write the key phrases down.  Whatever works for you.

But most of all, keep it fun.  You should be working together, having lots of time outside (see my “Connecting Children to Nature” post if you need help in that area), playing, singing. 

You can do Waldorf Kindergarten at home; just keep it simple!  You have several years of kindergarten, and your four-year-old should be at a really simple level; your six-year-old may need more.

Some of Waldorf Kindergarten really is just like the Nike slogan, “Just Do It.”  Quit reading so much, keep it simple to start and just live it all together and see what wonderful things happen!

Breathe and smile,

Carrie

Is It Too Late?

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I have had several mothers call me lately who are feeling what I call “the Waldorf guilt”.  They are looking, in most cases, at very verbal and sometimes physically aggressive 5 and 6 year old little girls and wondering if it is too late to start the Waldorf lifestyle with their little ones.  They feel the way they parented their children before may not have been as age and developmentally appropriate as it could have been.

First of all, please be very  easy with yourself if you find yourself in this situation.  We all are the best parents we can be with the information we have at the time.  Forgive yourself for any perceived inadequacies and move on.

Second, I would say it is never too late for the healing benefits of Waldorf.  However, I do think this takes sincere effort, planning, and change within the family.

Here are some thoughts that I think may be helpful if  you are trying to “switch” to a Waldorf  lifestyle for the benefit of your child’s health or to work with a very head-oriented child under the age of 7 or 8:

1.  Start small with consistent naptimes, bedtimes, and meal times.  Think foods made with your own hands and foods that are not far removed from what they really are….a whole apple as opposed to processed apple Pop-Tarts.  Think about the amount of sugar, dyes, additives your children are ingesting and work hard to limit those substances.

2.  Think about the concept of warmth.  I find many of these over-active, over-talkative little beings have a severe problem with lack of warmth, both intuitively from the family in an emotional or spiritual sense,  and also perhaps needing more physical warmth. 

For emotional or spiritual warmth:  If you meditate or pray, can you do that over your child after they go to sleep at night?  Soul warmth and energy flow there.   Can you laugh with your child, have fun, smile with your children?  Instead of all those words, how about a hug, a smile, a kiss?

If you feel your child needs more physical warmth, can you think about woolens for under their clothes, warm coats, hats, mittens?  Layering?  Does your child need more warmth in whatever space you have – warm colors in their room, layered rugs, curtains? 

3.  The very verbal child  under the age of 7 needs a parent who can stop talking to the child.  Lots of “Hhmm, I wonder that as well” kinds of comments, as opposed to the Doctoral Thesis on whatever the child is asking about.  Get your partner on board!  This is so important, and necessary.  If your partner is rather analytical, talk about the concept of doing the right thing at the right time.  You are not withholding knowledge of the world to the detriment of the small child, but rather waiting to bring it in at the right time when the child can process it well.  You are providing information in the right way in the right amount for the child’s age.

4.  I find for the most part the things that these children have said in the past has been given entirely too much weight.  I am not saying to ignore what your child says, or to ignore how your child says they feel!  But what I am saying is that YOU have to start to distinguish between is this random comment one that you should give weight to as a mother and then act upon or is it just that – a very random comment?  In this day and age and in our society we often take our children far too seriously about small things, (and probably not seriously enough about big things as they get older).

5.  This child needs HOURS a day outside to just be, and than a balancing of that with an activity that provides them quiet.  Have arts and crafts ready, woodworking, cooking projects, storytelling at the ready for these special, intimate moments.

6.  No media.  No media at all during this transformation.  No screens.   And model good behavior by cutting down on your screen time…can you do it?

7.  Plan some fun FAMILY activities with you, your partner, your child, siblings.  Sometimes these often serious and tense children need to see that, indeed, the family can have fun and laugh together.  It does not have to be something over the top and expensive – plan something like going hiking, roller skating, ice skating, planting a garden together, star watching.  Also do some projects around the house together so your child can see how a family works and plays together.

9. After you have a small rhythm going for the day –to -day kinds of things and weekly things, do start looking at festivals within the year.  (And if you need help with rhythm please do hit the rhythm tag in the tags box and all those posts will come up).    Not every family who celebrates festivals  celebrates religious ones, but Steiner did talk quite a bit about the importance of a spiritual life for the child.  Think about your own spiritual leanings and investigate this.   If you have no spiritual leanings at all, why not?  Perhaps a tradition completely different than the one you were raised with will speak to you.     Perhaps this is the inner work you are being called to do at this time. 

10.  Start working within yourself to be the change for the things you want to see in your family.  You set the tone for things in your family, you have a choice as to how you respond to things.  You don’t need to nag your partner about all this, but instead model, show, demonstrate, love.

Just a few thoughts to ponder,

Carrie

The Fabulous Five –Year -Old!

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Five-year-olds are rather interesting to me.  Many mothers lament from reading the Gesell Institute books that while the young five-year-old should be in this “golden period”, their child is decidedly not.  A five-year-old closer to turning six may also be in a bit of disequilibrium as well.  Five is an age that I feel deserves a closer look beyond the whole “this is a golden age” view……

Let’s take a look at typical characteristics of the young five year old, according again to our friends at The Gesell Institute:

  • Typically enjoys life and looks on the sunny side.
  • Wants to do everything “just right.”
  • Mother is the center of the child’s world again- many five-year-olds would rather stay in the house with Mother than go out to play with friends.
  • Typically loves his house, his street, his neighborhood.
  • Does not especially want new and different.
  • This is typically seen as one of those “golden ages” of childhood development where the child is in a state of harmony.
  • If your child is a young five and not in a state of harmony, do not despair.  I have found that for many children, the disequilibrium that seems to accompany four can take until a child is five and a quarter to really work out.  I happily refer you to my posts regarding “Peaceful Life With a Four-Year-Old” and “Fantastic Four-Year-Old!”.  They will help you sort out some things that may be helpful to your young five-year-old.
  • The other thing to look at any time a child is behaving in such a way you do not love is to look to yourself and your home first.  Are you feeling calm?  What is going on in your life and in the life of your family?  Start with centering yourself.  Look at the post on this blog entitled  “Peaceful Life With A Four-Year-Old”   here  https://theparentingpassageway.com/2009/02/07/peaceful-life-with-a-four-year-old/  and the post before that written about the developmental characteristics of a four-year-old.  The other place to look would be in the tag section and hit the tag called “Parenting Challenges” – a prime example of this type of post that may be helpful is this one: https://theparentingpassageway.com/2008/11/13/smearing-peas/  and there are many,many others that may stimulate thoughts for your own personal situation.

Hang in there though, because equilibrium is coming! (At least for a little while!)

Five-and-a-half is a bit different, however.  Here are some of the developmental characteristics as listed in the Gesell Institute’s “Your Five-Year-Old” regarding the five-and-a-half-year-old:

  • Usually has a great readiness to go against what is asked or expected of him.
  • Brash, combative.
  • Can be hesitant, dawdling, indecisive or at the opposite extreme, demanding and explosive
  • May be sick quite a bit – headaches, colds, stomachaches, earaches.
  • May revert to toileting accidents.
  • Lots of tensional outlets – these are the behaviors that parents dislike such as repeatedly biting nails, head banging, increased nose picking, fidgeting, increased masturbation.
  • Restless
  • Difficulty grasping pencils, may lose visual orientation and reverse numbers or letters (Did I mention The Gesell Institute feels five is NOT a good age to teach reading or writing??)
  • May have lots of nightmares.

 

Think about living with your five-year-old with these things in mind: Rhythm, Rules, and a sense of Reverence.

Rhythm – Your rhythm should carry your day.  I cannot stress this enough.  Unless you want to be arguing all day long with your small child, you need a rhythm where you normally do this and then do that.  Think about how you want things done. If we always clean up after we play, then there is no arguing about it.  If sometimes mommy cleans up, sometimes we clean up together, sometimes friends help clean up and sometimes they don’t, then we are in for some trouble.  So, spend some time looking at your daily activities and what needs to happen before and after these activities to make life enjoyable for all.

Rules – Keep your rules simple – think of them as skills and behaviors that children that are trying to learn and master rather than these things where bad things happen when you cannot control your child.  Think about phrasing them very simply, generally, and positively.

Reverence – Look for moments when you can instill in your child a sense of reverence for the beauty in every day; those moments where you stop and look at something outside, those moments where you can all sing together; those moments where you stop to pray or meditate or have a moment of silence before a meal.  Think about the way you approach your own tasks – is it trying to get through the task as quickly as possible, or is it approaching the task that nourishes your family is undertaken with loving kindness?

Keep looking to yourself and your own habits.  Review your own negative habits; do you nag, berate, command, dominate, yell, shame or punish your child when it might be helpful to find positive alternatives?  Can you be calm and help your child physically follow through in a peaceful way with whatever you asked him or her to do?

Yours in Peace,

Carrie