I hear about harried families almost every day – those who are completely overscheduled due to running children everywhere, those who have to “car school” because they are on the road running children everywhere, those you are searching high and low for the “simple” life promised in magazines and books….and wondering if such a thing really exists!
I think a calm family life can exist, but you do have to create it. Here are the top five ways I feel you can have a calm family life:
1. Take charge of your family’s schedule. In the United States, it seems that children’s activities are often “driving the boat” of family life. Is it more important that your children be a part of every activity known to man or is it more important that you enjoy the years you have with your children in an unhurried manner? Sometimes we can answer what our activities and priorities should be by creating or looking back at our Family Mission Statement.
Our own personal Family Mission Statement at this time is KIPPA: kindness, integrity, positive attitude, patience and adventure. Something short and sweet that everyone can say and begin to model works well. We haven’t updated ours in awhile, so that is on the list to do this summer to think about. I would love to hear about your Family Mission Statement if you have one!
2. Let things go. You can say no! Make sure you are not keeping yourself so busy so that you don’t have to look too deeply at yourself, your family life, or other areas in life that really need your attention.
Letting go can also include the physical – like the physical clutter of the home, or as FlyLady says, the “body clutter”. It can also include relationships or communities that are no longer nourishing you. It is okay that things change over time! Life is a series of changes – big and small.
3. Build in time and space around activities. If you are out one day, be home for two days around that out day. This can especially work well for younger children. Take time and space for yourself. Where is your rest time, your down time, your vacation time? Can you teach your children to be comfortable with space and time and not “busy going” all the time? What a wonderful gift you will be giving them to teach them that through your modeling!
4. Devote time to yourself. I see so many mothers who are spending all of their time at their children’s activities, and fail to put a priority on their own eating, sleeping and exercise. Your physical health is really, really important. Why not make this summer the summer of your health? Put in the time it takes to make healthy and from -scratch meals; to daily exercise (yes, I said daily!), to sleep and rest and for your inner work in whatever capacity this means to you. I would love to hear your success stories!
5. Positivity. Being a positive mother, partner and friend can reverberate throughout all the communities and relationships of your life. Surround yourself with positivity, think positive, be generous with your encouraging words and watch the calmness come into your family!
Many blessings and love,
Carrie
Thank you, this is wonderful and just what I needed to read today! Kristie
From: The Parenting Passageway To: tokristie@yahoo.com Sent: Wednesday, June 3, 2015 8:08 PM Subject: [New post] 5 Ways To Have A Calm Family Life #yiv2897408696 a:hover {color:red;}#yiv2897408696 a {text-decoration:none;color:#0088cc;}#yiv2897408696 a.yiv2897408696primaryactionlink:link, #yiv2897408696 a.yiv2897408696primaryactionlink:visited {background-color:#2585B2;color:#fff;}#yiv2897408696 a.yiv2897408696primaryactionlink:hover, #yiv2897408696 a.yiv2897408696primaryactionlink:active {background-color:#11729E;color:#fff;}#yiv2897408696 WordPress.com | Carrie posted: “I hear about harried families almost every day – those who are completely overschedule and running children everywhere, those who have to “car school” because they are on the road running children everywhere, those you are searching high and low for” | |
Family motto: Safe, pleasant and kind! (This is because we have 2 kids under 5, and it’s a mantra they can repeat easily!!)
Thanks for another great family message.
I love that Kate – thanks for sharing!!
Blessings,
Carrie
Just what I needed to read this morning! I have been so burnt out lately and part of it is Little League! 3 games during the week and practice as well…Only two more games, though. So I see the light at the end of the tunnel. It’s the only sport my son plays, but it is 6 weeks of “hell” for me!
Hugs and love, Mary Lynn!
Blessings,
Carrie
Wonderful post! Letting go was a big priority for the past 6 months for me. I do feel more peaceful now that I have said goodbye to things and indeed some people in my life. Working out a less intense schedule for the next school year is something to work on though. And taking better care of myself 😀
Family motto is “Always Love”, adding “and sanity” to it now 😀
Anya – I love that! SANITY is so important! In the case of Waldorf homeschooling, I see so many parents trying to recreate the Waldorf School down to two languages and everything else..it is not possible in the long run, I don’t think, to sustain!
I love your new focus on sanity!
Blessings,
Carrie
What a fabulous post. It’s short, sweet, and a reminder I need regularly. I spent time in the last few months letting go of clutter of all shapes and sizes. Letting go of relationships is the hardest. (Guilt!) I don’t find it difficult to say no to things and limit activities, but I do find it difficult, as a homeschooler, to schedule what few activities we do participate in, so that they fall into a nice rhythm. Activities feel scattered to me. Warmly, Nicola
Pingback: Mama Reads Monday - Laughing, Calm, Hurrying, & MORE!
A simple yet powerful list, Carrie. Thank you. My big three are letting things go, building in space or what I call margin around activities, and down time for me. I’ve been mulling over the concept of sustainable homeschooling, that’s what we’re aiming for. Sustainable parenting and sustainable homeschooling.
Pingback: Sunday Morning Shout Out | tutordoctorwny01
Pingback: These Are A Few of My Favorite Things: June | The Parenting Passageway