Is within your reach. Is not only possible and plausible, but waiting for you. It begins with you.
Peace begins with feeling physically, emotionally and spiritually strong. I see so many beautiful mothers who really neglect their health until something happens, and they know they HAVE to start making home cooking, menu planning, sleep, exercise, health appointments and other things necessary for them to enjoy good health because within it, their family cannot thrive! If you are homeschooling or have stay at home children, putting these things as part of the rhythm is so important , along with the “how” – who will watch the children whilst you cook 20 freezer meals? Who will watch your children if you go for a walk or do yoga, etc? The “how” is as important as the “when”.
So many mothers are running on empty emotional tanks or still working on their baggage from their own childhood and childhood memories. Parenting small children often brings these sorts of memories, feelings and triggers alive. You can learn how to handle your triggers – your anger or anxiety, your own sadness even at your childhood – and not bring that into another cycle of emotional challenge for your own children. I highly recommend family and marital counselors; many will work on a sliding scale. I also recommend finding what fills your tank outside and apart from parenting as investing even just a little time in this area will fulfill you in such strong ways. What is your dream? For some it is begin home with children. For some that is is not all of their dream, but certainly part of their dream. And the vision and dream can shift over the years – as we get older, into our later 40s and 50s – it seems to me that it becomes more important to have something to call our own as our own children grow up.
Spirituality is another area that many people seem to neglect or have little interest in…and yet the pull to the Divine Creator, I think is normally there and at some point this pull becomes a stronger and more intimate place than perhaps it had been before. Some people experience a spiritual crisis where their entire belief system changes. For some mothers, a belief system doesn’t have anything to do with religion, but it could.
When you are feeling on track yourself, you have the energy to deal with the things in your own home, and then you have the energy to deal with things outside of your home. It seems to move in concentric circles of influence, so to speak.
I would love to hear your plans for the New Year to begin with peace for you so it can extend into and weave throughout your whole family. Let me know what you are up to! What is your biggest priority for your own peace this year?
Thank you for another wonderful post I can absolutely relate to. Taking care of myself and be healthy physically and mentally became a priority recently as children are older now and have higher demands. My biggest priority is to get calmer and to learn how to manage my stress levels better. I want to learn how to meditate properly too. Simplifying everything I can simplify is another big goal.
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Thank you for sharing Carrie. Spiritual balance is crucial, if not more important, than emotional, physical and all others. It gives us a compass by which all other areas of our lives can take guidance and thus we can progress-afterall is not to perfect ourselves that we are here? The Creator is Perfect so to is His creation. We are so busy that we don’t have time to think and ponder, somethings around us rob us of this as well,constant ads, media, news, etc. We have to carve it out and then naturally goals in other areas can be met. I hope that you and your family and all families here have a blessed and bountiful year!
Love this post. On New Years Day I took a walk in the woods to contemplate what this late 40s mama should take on next. The Divine guidance I got was- a peaceful home, a loving heart and eyes open to the opportunites in front of you.
Then I come home to find that you are posting on peaceful family. Perfect. Divine!
I love this post so much! This is a thing I feel every mama needs to hear – love yourself first, it will enable you to be your best self.
2014 was an amazing year for growth and I learned so much about practicing self care, being gentle with myself, being in touch with my emotional state and needs – and I believe the growth in that area helped me survive the hardest thing I’ve ever gone through, the loss of my baby son Wendell who was stillborn at 28 weeks. I’m still in the grieving process and I think always will be, but I haven’t ever felt drowning in grief or in despair and I think it’s because I could be in touch with my feelings, allow myself to feel whatever I needed to feel whether rage, sadness, jealousy, or joy, and I knew to ask for help when I needed it and lean on those who love me.
My one resolution for 2015 is this: learn to love myself more. Right where I am, not once I lose ten pounds or make healthier boundaries or keep the garden weed free. I want to love myself more in the beautiful imperfection of my humanity.
Oh, Kirsten – my deepest sympathies and hugs and love to you.
You are amazing.
I love your strong spirit and resilience, may those things carry you through the days that are darker and may you see the sunshine.
Lovely thoughts. I appreciate reading them so much! We’re tackling bedtime in 2015 🙂 I’ve made it a priority to get myself to bed by 9ish which means dinner and the girls’ bedtime need to be smooth sailing and on time. It is a minor tweak in many respects that I think will yield tremendously!
Just tonight I was reflecting on the fact that spiritual work, spiritual growth takes time. Time, time. Time we so often don’t have. Not just time reading, in worship or service, but the stewing…there’s no time for just stewing! While we have a slower pace of life than many around us, I still feel out of breath from time to time. A mishap with travel plans this season left us at home with what seemed like endless days. I have grown so much from within these past 2 weeks– we all have, just simply because we kept it simple for nearly 2 weeks. Sheila
I love that Sheila! The same thing has happened to me with having the flu for so long, and simply not being able to do much of anything.
There are gifts in those endless days, and spiritual growth is one of them.
Carrie your words resonate so deeply with me. I am turning 45 this year and the need to call something my own is bigger than I have ever felt before. I know homeschooling our children is my top priority but I am asking myself a lot lately “what about me?”. Thanks for sharing your powerful words and giving more to think about.
I loved this:
“What is your dream? For some it is begin home with children. For some that is is not all of their dream, but certainly part of their dream.”
I have really being mulling this over this fall and winter. I do want to be home with my children, who are still very young, but I am also feeling drawn to studying nutrition and perhaps the idea of working as a nutritionist someday, or maybe writing about nutrition. I can’t see from where I stand now whether it’s possible to both homeschool my kids and do something that’s just mine. I am not in love with the idea of putting my kids in school so I can pursue a career – that’s not the pull I’m feeling. I wish I knew people in real life who have homeschooled and manged to also pursue some kind of work or hobby for themselves. It’s both challenging and exciting to contemplate pursuing something that there isn’t a great model for because it’s not what “everybody” is doing.