Our 31 days to the inner rhythm of the heart, the root foundation of a house of peace, is in progress. In the vein of those who are setting a New Year’s intention with “one word”, I offer the word of today to you: time. Read on for more…
“Time” is a simple shorthand to mean several different things:
If a no-yelling household is important to you, then you must spend time on building on the positive things you identify. This requires time to be home and with the ones you love.
If a no-yelling household is important to you, then you must spend time connecting in a loving way with the people in your home.
If a no-yelling household is important to you, then you must be home and present without running a million places.
Simplify your time to reflect your priorities. If creating a calm and peaceful household is your goal, then staying home will help you accomplish your goal because it will give you the time to stay centered, to not rush, to be present.
Most mothers have a tipping point of how much they can be out of the home and feel calm. I know I do! You can stay home and love it, and it can help you deepen your relationships to a level where yelling is not the norm in your household.
I listened to a speaker recently at my church who talked about “the one activity” rule. He was speaking to a crowd of parents who had teenagers and was talking about one activity. If teenagers only need one activity, how many activities do children even smaller than this need? How many activities do you notice your children or your family can engage in outside the home before you reach the tipping point of feeling stressed and like there is always something to do? We all have different temperaments and personalities, but I guarantee even the most extroverted, social and energized of us has a tipping point!
If you can find your tipping point, if your children and spouse or partner can begin to identify the tipping point of time in schedules of outside activities for your family, then you can begin to put boundaries on the use of your time in a healthy way.
If you are questioning if staying home would be helpful for your family, or are fearful that staying home would not make you happy, I suggest this back post: https://theparentingpassageway.com/2010/11/06/back-to-basics-staying-at-home-and-loving-it/
Your homework this week with your accountability partner and your journal is to look at the use of your time – the outside activities of the family, the errand running, the use of your time. Are you content with how things are, or does there need to be a change?
Excellently written. So true. Time is so important and being at home allows us to spend time on the important things in life, which means allowing our little ones not to feel rushed. It’s a constant priority to remember to slow down and leave enough time for us to listen to our little one and other members in our family, without needing to be somewhere all the time. Bless you in Jesus Name for this beautiful article.
Thank you, Linda!
Many blessings to you,
Good morning Carrie!
I was wondering about the speaker you mention, I would assume that he talked about school children. I think for children who go to school this makes sense, but does this same apply for homeschooled children who do not have any other social activities?
My son pointed out to me the other day that he does not really have a best friend, hearing this statement from one of his schooled friends. I have also heard from many homeschoolers that at the age of 9 children need to get more social interaction and with only one hour of outside activity (besides Sunday church) at the moment I am worried that he does not get enough interaction with other children.
Yes, Maggie, it seems in my experience that boys around the age of nine or ten really do care if they have a friend or friends..but the question is how to meet that need? Is it through more structured activities or is it through some other means?
Yes, I think there needs to be a balance, especially for our older boys who are homeschooled, who sometimes seem to me to be rather alone. If your mama intuition is telling you something, I would follow that.
What could you do that could lead to the possibility of a heartfelt friend?
Well, this is a question that can be difficult to answer, but we are normally not a family for too many structured activities anyway. If you would have asked me this a couple of years ago I would have been at a loss, but now I am happy that we have made some more friends and we are visiting them again. I think I will try to make our get together regular again, maybe not every week but more often than once every other month.