We all know this child, the negative child who seems to have less joy than the other children, the one who is already not sure if Santa Claus exists, the one who tends to look at the glass half empty and the one who just seems more like a jaded teenager than a five year old.
Sigh. That is so hard, so challenging, and so heart-wrenching for so many parents. Parents really wonder what they did to make their child feel the way they do…. Here is an article from a parent and anthroposophic medical professional’s experience in healing children with physical and emotional challenges that may be of service: http://www.anthromed.org/Article.aspx?artpk=702
Here are my suggestions to help this child:
1. Pray about this child, meditate over this child at night whilst they are sleeping, and practice visualizing a smiling, laughing child in your mind’s eye. Try to re-frame your very thoughts about this child.
2. Look carefully at the media diet and adult conversation surrounding this child. This is most important in so many ways. As much as possible, this child really does need to be shielded from adult worries and concerns as they are already “adult” enough. Cut out media if that exists.
3. Look for physical causes – this is a child who may very well benefit from Flower Essences and homeopathics. I cannot tell you which ones, but your local homeopath or naturopath should have ways to test and figure out what essences and things would be best. I have used Flower Essences and homeopathics to great effect with my own children.
4. As much as possible, go out of the whole” head” part and into the body. Massages, foot rubs, wrestling games, singing games, all the things that really nurture the lower four senses are so important. It is easy to try to “talk” them out of their negativity, and yet this rarely works! Work with their body instead!
5. Model joy for this child as much as possible in your own work. And show them real work and give them real work to do.
6. Don’t react strongly to the negative words and such, ho-hum, ho-hum. You are not responsible for your child’s feelings. Their feelings are theirs, but at under 7 they should still be very connected to you, so your modeling of emotions is very important.
7. This is a child who needs to be outside A LOT. Walking trails, biking, swimming, picking apples and berries, just being, watching birds, hunting for bugs, looking for tracks, building fairy houses, digging in the dirt. I would shoot for four hours outside a day if at all possible.
8. This child needs a diet of food close to its natural state that are warming, and please make sure this child is wearing enough layers as well. See the “warmth” tag on this blog for ideas. Give this child a lot of emotional warmth.
9. Do things with this child as a family that are FUN! Go hiking, roller skating, ice skating, berry picking, apple picking, play games together, go to the park, fly kites.
10. This is a child that needs warm and cozy routines for rest and bed times.
It is a challenging situation, but I believe one that a parent can work with if they have the right tools.