Life Skills For Seventh and Eighth Graders

I think both as parents and homeschoolers, we are always working on “life skills”.  After all, it is the goal of most parents that their children are able to live independently and know how to maintain a house, take care of their own finances, and be able to care for a home or a family!

I made a list of life skills for seventh grade through high school, and I keep adding things to it , as I go along so this is not an all-inclusive list.  Please feel free to use it as a base for your own list and modify and add it to it so it reflects the things that are important in your family. 

AUTO SKILLS:  (more high school)

  • Auto care (change the oil, jump the battery, replace fluids, change oil and filter, change a flat)
  • How to drive a car; defensive driving and the dangers of driving under the influence of alcohol or drugs
  • How to buy a good used car
  • How to look for and deal with auto insurance, what to do in case of an accident

PRACTICAL SKILLS:  (seventh grade and up)

  • Carpentry and woodworking
  • Knife skills (whittling and carving),
  • Mending holes/hemming pants/sewing buttons,
  • Replace a bike tire and do basic bike maintenance and repair
  • How to vote
  • How to take good notes from a lecture or sermon
  • Packing a suitcase for a trip independently
  • How to tie a neck tie and bow tie
  • Manners/fine dining – how to introduce people and start a conversation
  • How to organize and host a party without help
  • Phone etiquette (ordering, returning, asking for info, answering)
  • Self defense
  • How to knit, crochet, cross stitch, hand sew and machine sew; how to make patterns
  • First aid and CPR, basic herbal and natural remedies for common ailments; how to put together a “natural” medicine toolbox, the role of allopathic health care and how to access it; how to deal with medical bills and insurance
  • How to dance  – whether that is square dancing or line dancing or formal ballroom dancing is up to you!
  • Homesteading skills, care of livestock, hunting or fishing skills might also come here if you do that in your family life
  • Buying a house, homeowner’s insurance, buying versus renting
  • Pet Care – care of puppies or kittens, how to dialogue with a vet, healthy feeding and exercise, housebreaking, positive clicker training,  typical health and behavioral  problems and how to help, lifespan of a pet, making end of life decisions for your pet

Home Skills: (all ages)

  • How to “deep clean” a house from top to bottom
  • How to maintain a home during the week
  • Air conditioning/heating and plumbing basic trouble shooting
  • How to paint rooms
  • How to unclog a sink or tub drain
  • How to can/freeze/dry/ferment food
  • How to write a list and follow it at the grocery store; menu planning
  • How to do laundry from start to finish, ironing
  • How to organize a house
  • How to prepare a variety of healthy meals from scratch
  • Basic fix-it skills and troubleshooting for the home


  • How to write a resume
  • Typing and computer skills
  • Job interview skills
  • How to build and work with a team
  • How to work with difficult people
  • How to resolve conflict
  • Effective communication skills; difference between communication and conversation
  • Picking a career that is right for you – Myers Briggs testing or other personality trait testing, how aptitudes and strengths can play into a good career choice


  • How to apply for a mortgage, steps of buying a house
  • How to write a check and balance a check book, how to manage on line banking
  • Budgeting/money management
  • How to invest and save for retirement
  • How to understand parts of a paystub


  • Basic infant development, basic principles of baby care – pregnancy, birth, breastfeeding, sleep rhythms, baby wearing, gentle discipline, how to bathe, how and when to start solids, value of rhythm and outside time, warmth, normal attachment and what contributes to family-infant attachment, microflora in the gut and how to cultivate that in the most healthy manner 
  • Normal stages of development  ages 0-5, how to identify challenges
  • How to talk to your infant’s health care team


  • Essentials of self-respect and self-love, which is a foundational skill to bring to relationships
  • Differences between assertive, passive and aggressive behavior and communication
  • Discussions on dating violence; affects of verbal abuse
  • Effective communication skills
  • Take your own Myers Briggs test and how to use this information in relationships
  • How to resolve conflict
  • What to look for in choosing a person to share your life with, what factors help make a successful partnership, how to nurture a partnership or marriage

Skills for Personal Health:

  • Finding types of exercise that can be done throughout a lifetime
  • Addiction issues; addiction myths
  • Healthy sexuality
  • Use of alternative methods for health (herbal, homeopathic, healing foods)
  • Sleeping  – its importance, health sleep habits
  • Positivity; dealing with baby blues, depression, anxiety
  • How to deal with stress in a healthy way
  • Physical health issues specific to gender

I am certain there are many other things you can put on this list or that you can create your own categories.  I have a category for Christian Life as well if any of my Christian readers are interested.

I will list some specific resources we used in seventh grade and that we are using this year in the next post.



Homeschooling High School

I am writing quick updates as I go along to mark our journey and hopefully to show how much further along we will be when we go through this process with our subsequent children! (Poor little first child guinea pig!)  You can see my previous thoughts in a back post about pondering homeschooling high school.  I have been doing a little bit of research since then, and thought I would share a few things.

  • One thing I did was pull curriculum from a wide variety of Waldorf High Schools to see what is taught when at different schools.  I was particularly interested in where the curriculum differed or was adapted for a regional area.
  • I read two small books by Lee Binz: “Setting the Records Straight:  How to Craft Homeschool Transcripts and Course Descriptions for College Admission and Scholarships” and “How to Homeschool 9th and 10th Grade:  Simple Steps for Starting Strong”.
  • Based upon the suggestions in Lee’s book about crafting transcripts, I wrote a description of our high school and our eighth grader and  I named it.  Unlike many others, we have never had a “school name” before!   Very exciting!  Because we are focused on a holistic, artistic, interrelated curriculum and  experiential style of learning with Waldorf Education, these were heavily considered in the  description of our high school.
  • We looked at the “requirements” of credit hours in order to apply for college.  I looked at the requirements for the University system of our state, and then several colleges I handpicked in other neighboring states and one private school just to get a feel for requirements in our region.  Most students applying to high school have 24 credits or so, but the actual state requirement for graduation is only 17 credits for four years of high school – 4 in English, 4 in Math, 4 in Natural Sciences, 3 in Social Studies, 2 in Foreign Languages.  Some universities asked for specific things, such as “fine arts elective – 1 credit”; some asked for “American Economics and Government – 1 credit or “general electives – 2 credits”.
  • Some universities want a brief description of the course the student has taken, required texts, sample of work, and HOW the course was graded – ie, the grade was comprised of  1/2 homework assignments, 1/2 quizzes and test, etc.    Again, because of the experiential nature of our schooling, I am having to think about what part “experiences” will play in the grading of courses.
  • I found out a general timeline for taking the PSAT, SAT, ACT and also how to access AP classes.  This is more important for some universities than others – for example, if Georgia Tech was a goal, ninety-something percent of incoming freshman have taken AP Calculus or equivalent, and the average incoming student has taken  9 AP classes or more.  Important things to know!
  • I am still sorting through the science end of high school –>While the typical Waldorf High School still does science in blocks and has a multi-disciplinary focus in science all years (ie, ninth grade could contain anatomy and physiology, geology, physics and chemistry, for example), the credit hours don’t add up well until one has complete all four years as far as I can tell…ie, you may not have all the hours for “biology” until senior year of high school.  And, most college applications want to see 1 credit biology with lab, 1 credit chemistry with lab, etc when students apply…So perhaps others out there can enlighten me how this normally works at home or if most Waldorf homeschoolers just decided to go a more traditional route for high school sciences in terms of biology one year, chemistry one year, etc?


Monthly Anchor Points: September


Anchor:  a person or thing that can be relied on for support, stability, or security; mainstay: Hope was his only anchor.

When we work to become the author of own family life, we take on the authority to provide our spouse and children and ourselves stability.  An effective way to do this is through the use of rhythm.  If you have small children, it takes time to build a family rhythm that encompasses the year.  If you are homeschooling older children and also have younger children not yet ready for formal learning, the cycle of the year through the seasons and through your religious year becomes the number one tool you have for family unity, for family identity, for stability.

Welcome, September! One of my favorite months because it is a month of new beginnings, which I love.   I wrote a  post regarding September and some of the wonderful things in this month here

Here are the things that we are celebrating this month:

  • September 1 – Labor Day
  • September 8 – The Nativity of St. Mary, the Theotokos
  • September 14 – Holy Cross Day
  • September 29 – The Feast of St. Michael and All Angels

Ideas for Celebration:

For Labor Day, we enjoyed a camping weekend this year that was a lot of fun.  Last year it was boating on the lake.  I would especially love to find a parade, but these seem to be most common in the northeastern part of the United States and not particularly where I live.  If you look at last year’s post I linked to above, I talked about finding things that were built in your community and sharing that with your children for Labor Day.

The Nativity of St. Mary and for Holy Cross Day, for us, are days primarily for celebrating in church and through prayer and  literature.  There are some lovely books about St. Mary and St. Helena for Holy Cross Day as well. 

The Feast of St. Michael and All Angels is of course a big feast day in the church and also in Michaelmas in Waldorf Education.  You can see my Michaelmas Pinterest board for some ideas I collected.

The Domestic Life:

September is the month in which I like to de-clutter and make room for fall things.  It can also be the time of fall garden clean-up and time to make lists of needed winter clothing.


Kindergarten:  We are mainly going through our six year old kindergarten year working through the feast days.  Last month we focused on St. Herman of Alaska, The Dormition of St. Mary, and St. Aidan, along with the life of monks.  This month, we are focused on stories of St. Michael, stories of angels and St. Helena.  It is so rewarding to see the excitement on my little one’s face about the liturgical year!

In our circle we are focused on songs and verses regarding Michaelmas, and our fall friends the apple tree and the squirrel.  Our circle is lovely with rich Michaelmas and Autumn songs.  Our stories this month were Suzanne Down’s “There is a Bear in Our Plum Tree!” (I hope that is the actual title!) and “The Princess In The Flaming Castle”, which can be found in the back of the red book, “Let Us Form A Ring”.   We have been baking cookies and baked apples, drawing apple trees and telling stories and songs about the star inside the apple and the five little rooms inside the apple, playing with modeling materials and watercolor painting, and planning a field trip to go apple picking!

Fifth Grade: We are still working with math concepts, spelling and handwriting.  Our Botany block is coming along– we have mainly covered roots, stems and leaves; fungi, algae and lichens, mosses and ferns with hopes to finish up with conifers, trees and flowering plants.  I have had some particular epiphanies about ways to approach this block and hope to share that at some point.  Our reading has been focused on the work of Holling C. Holling (two books), “Girls Who Looked Under Rocks” as an independent reader, and “A Day in the Alpine Tundra”, “A Day in the Woods” by Jean Craighead George.

Other than that, life has been busy with choir, horses and swimming for our fifth grader.

Eighth Grade:  We finished our math block focusing on stereometry and loci and have moved into an American history block.  We are reviewing a lot of math and working out some formulas for area and volume, which we also did last year but this year is more in depth and practice. We also are doing some separate work putting together a main lesson book on World Geography.   Our eighth grader is busy with a typing program on-line and is submitting work to an Oak Meadow teacher for high school Spanish I.    Other than that, much fun and busy life times with 4-H, horses, choir.

In the meantime, I have started naming and writing a description of our high school for future high school transcripts.  I think we have decided what to tackle in ninth grade and how “grading” for those courses will occur, since that is something that some colleges want spelled out on paper when looking at a homeschooler’s admission paperwork.  Much more to think about there!

Self-Care:  I wish I had more to say about this, but it is still a struggle.  I find time for myself early in the morning or late at night and have had very little success in doing anything during the day or later afternoon or early evening hours just for me.  I don’t see that changing in the forseeable future!

Please share your successes, ideas and plans for September!  I would love to hear from you!


The Non-Eager Learner

Many families have children who are so smart and so eager to learn.  They talk early, they read early, they are full of interesting questions about the world around them.  They are easy to teach and really,  they practically teach themselves.

And then there are other children who are not so eager to learn.  And I find amongst this “category” there are different groups of children…There may be the type of child that may not be interested in much outside of their own bodies and when food will be served.  They do not display  much interest in those abstract letters on signs or in books, and are not too interested in writing or math.  These are the kind of children that want to eat their way through any kind of main lesson.   The second type of child I have observed are the children that are very dreamy children.   Perhaps they are living in a little world of their own and are not too interested in coming out of that.  We probably all knew very dreamy children growing up.  Maybe we were those children growing up ourselves.  They don’t seem to have a lot of questions about the world around them, at least on the surface.  Maybe they do inside but they don’t ask the questions outwardly, and don’t give too much of a reaction to the things you try to bring as a teacher.  

I think perhaps the third type of child, whom I would NOT consider a “non-eager” learner are the “do-ers”  who really have so much to do that they just cannot sit down to any sort of book work.  I think these children come along just fine, and homeschooling gives them the time and space to be who they are.  They often seem to come into their own in the later middle school and high school years.  I would like to talk about that group in another post.

The typical advice I see for this on the Internet and in talking to teachers about “non-eager learners”  is one of two avenues.  For children in school, the recommendation is to volunteer in the classroom, dialogue with the teacher, sit with the child for homework.  In the homeschooling camp, the advice more often seems to be expose your child to a lot of things, take note of what a child likes to DO and see if you can build off of that, and don’t worry about a “passion” until high school years.

I think any of these pieces in and of their own can be helpful, but as always LOOK at the child in front of you.  Here are a few of my ideas to ponder as well:

For tiny children, under the age of 7, you probably know what I am going to say.  The American school system has now changed to the extent of what I studied in second grade as a child is now the kindergarten.  I feel there is far too much “academic” head work in kindergarten and PreK right now.  In fact, there was a recent article in the Washington Post discussing how the emphasis on academic skills is at a great cost to the child in terms of social-emotional skills and the development of the bodily senses.  If your child is in school, look at grade placement closely.  At this point in time, I have to say older age for the grade is better because of the ridiculous work level. Also, look at rhythm and  routine – is your child getting energy out and having time for free play in the hours after school?  Can you look at alternative schooling situations that match development?

The flip side of this, I think is to establish a good RHYTHM of work.  If your child is in school and expected to do homework and such, this is important, but this is especially important in the homeschool environment for children under the age of 7.   Your child can weave in and out of your work in the Early Years, and absolutely have plenty of time for free creative play and outside play,  but they should not just wander all day long with no adult input if you intend to do some sort of grades schooling that involves sitting down and doing something that you help to direct.   There should be things that are theirs to do in the family, and they should be able to imitate what you are doing and want to join in.  Rhythm in the early years is the key to easier homeschooling in the grades, especially in the beginning grades when children are learning how to be more academic learners.

For children between the ages of 7 and 9 in the homeschool environment, I offer you the ideas of Rudolf Steiner in his lectures, (not  in the school form).  Ages 7 to 9 should still be a good amount of bodily movement – look and see where your child’s physical development really is.  Lack of core strength can really impede writing, for example, and also affect visual convergence and speech.  Look at your child.  Also, think about how much DOING you are asking for versus just sitting and doing something.  It may seem easier to have story, drawing, summary, but I feel this is not at all what Rudolf Steiner intended.   If children this age are able to sit for long periods and don’t want to move, I worry, quite frankly. 

The main challenges I hear from mothers of children this age is a complete disinterest in academic skills (practicing writing, reading,  etc); lack of memory for academic skills; inability to sit still for academic work. Sometimes learning challenges are apparent in this stage, and little things together can add up to a bigger picture of learning skills.  For example, for children who are non-eager learners, maybe reading and writing is difficult in any way or shape or form, but puzzles and mazes are also difficult, crafts are not welcomed, there is not an attention to a task such as cooking.  This could be something bigger than simply “not wanting to.”  If you are concerned about the possibility of learning disabilities or visual problems, I suggest you speak with your health care team.

If you feel there are no challenges, I think one way to approach this age group is two-fold:  working within the physical body and then short bursts of practice as you see your child respond to best.  Choose what you require to be written carefully, and know that in many children academic skills involving lots of writing may not blossom until later ages.  You can introduce, keep it short, be persistent,  circle round and build on things, but you are waiting for development to unfold.   Build great vocabulary and concepts through storytelling and wonderful stories.   Watch and observe your child, use the things your child enjoys within the context of the curriculum, read together, do real-life math and games and know that it really is sinking in.  Focus on doing, and short practice. 

For children between ages 10 and 14,  this should be when interest in the outside world and  academic skills are typically increasing.  For some children, this academic leap will be in fourth and fifth grade, for some children this will be in fifth and sixth grade (I am talking about a homeschooling environment, where we have more time and space to let things ride).  Usually by seventh and eighth grade, many things are evened out and there is a greater ability to start “true academic work” of writing, more examples of critical thinking and original work.   Again, always be on the lookout for any learning challenges that are impeding the way and have not yet been worked with. 

I personally  find the often quoted, “Everything evens out by fourth grade” to be a fallacy in homeschooling.  Many times, children are reading around fourth grade, but some do not read well or are  not really interested in that until age 12.  Sometimes math has sort of evened out, but many times children don’t seem to “get math” until they are 12 and more abstract reasoning has developed.  I myself didn’t develop good math skills until I was a junior in high school and suddenly it all clicked in a way where I really understand the why’s behind what I was doing.  I have no doubt that this was some sort of developmental window  that was personal to me.  So, the years between 10 and 14, and especially  between ages 10 and 12,  require a good amount of patience and persistence and observation of the child on the part of the homeschooling teacher.

For children ages 14 to 16, I feel things should really be coming together at this point.  I know many mothers have talked about the “hibernation” of children at this age, but I see many homeschooled teenagers at this point developing or at least trying on emerging passions and interests in real life and then developing the academic skills they need to support that.    Many academic checklists cite the grades 8-12 as a time of “emerging abstract skills”, so that means that every child could have a timetable that is individual to himself or herself within that time frame.  It may not all click in eighth grade, but it might click in tenth grade or eleventh grade. 

I would love to hear your thoughts and experiences regarding working with “non-eager” learners.

Many blessings,

Homeschooling is Taking All Day! What Do I Do?

This topic is going around Marsha Johnson’s Waldorf Home Educators Yahoo list, but it must be something in the air because one of my best friends and I have been having this conversation for weeks.  Apparently it is on the collective consciousness of the homeschooling community!

My schedule with having two out of my three children in the upper grades (which I consider grades 5-8) is quite different than it has been in the past.  Right now, it essentially boils down to the fact that I DO have to keep an eye on the clock.  I am torn about that, because part of homeschooling is the ability to sit and ponder and think and go “deeper” but if I do that with one child who takes four hours and  can only do that with me sitting right there, no one else gets what they need.  Also, because of our large age gaps, I cannot really combine much at this point.  Please see my back post about homeschooling the large family for some talk about combining in Waldorf homeschooling, because there are lots and lots of ways that you typically can combine!  There are broader age categories for things than typical in a Waldorf School!

Some mothers are masters at having all children working on main lessons at the same time in the same room.  I wish I could do that but I don’t seem to be able to do it;  my children can’t concentrate that way and neither can I.  So I don’t approach school  that way, but it can be a helpful approach for so many. Instead,  I approach it as what does that child  need from me directly, what can they do on their own and how do I encourage that (which also takes time and planning)  (and no, my oldest really wasn’t adept at this until sixth-seventh grade, my now fifth grader is a little more independent, and I have a feeling our third child will be the most independent worker of all – so LOOK at the temperaments and personalities of the children in front of you, and look carefully at how YOU are encouraging independent work from your child once they are past the nine year change), and what is essential in terms of building capacities for that particular child.

So, right now I essentially start with a walk for everyone (which I had given up for a long time and have now come back to it), but I keep it short.  By 8:45 our fifth grader and I are doing our main lesson.  Our eighth grader is doing independent work (piano practice, outside distance learning Spanish class homework)  and then working with her younger brother.  At 10:15, I work with our littlest member and our oldest does her independent math work and our fifth grader rests and reads independently for school. (In the past our older children did circle time with our youngest, but not this year.  We may go back to that next year).   At 11:00 I start with our eighth grader and our fifth grader can finish any work needed and then play with her little brother.  We eat lunch at 12:30 and rest.  We come back a few afternoons a week for handwork with a read-aloud, and a few one on one times for special subjects for both older child – for our eighth grader this happens to be World Geography and in the spring it will be Civics and for our fifth grader it is extra lesson activities and math.  On those days, school does go “long”, but I expect that with an eighth grader in the house!   Also, three days a week I work an extra forty-five minutes in  with our eighth grader on math that “would be in a block” and/or Life Skills.  Know the homeschool laws in your state; are there requirements for hours a day or year to be completed?

I think the key to having less full days with younger children in the early grades is 1- to make sure you really get through the “main lesson” part  early on in the day , if having it done early works for you.   2 – do not schedule your home school like a Waldorf School with too many different periods and such – you are one person and will have to be “on” for all those different lessons – remember,  homeschooling is and should and will be different than a school environment 3 – be prepared so you can be efficient – have your drawings done ahead of time, but also draw with your child, know what you are teaching, know what your child really needs and is the essential for that child at that time 4 – remember that for homeschooling to work long-term you have GOT to take care of YOURSELF and the family in terms of meals, rest, exercise and so forth – so resting after lunch, having time during the week to do what YOU as a person  outside of being a mother and homeschool teacher need to do is VITALLY important! and 5 – remember what pieces of “real life” in your real home nurturing schedule are developing capacities – cooking is so much math; playing games can also be logic and math and reading; writing grocery lists and thank you cards are developing skills – start thinking outside of the school box and finally 6 –  yes, you may need to keep an eye on the clock.   Some families are content to go all day, but many have other things to do either for other children in the family or for the home, etc.  The rhythm of school has to work for all of the family in order to be sustainable.

Please do share your experiences.  Help your fellow homeschooling mothers!


Adjusting to Middle School

In the United States, many eleven and twelve year olds are off to grades sixth through eighth at a separate school from elementary school.  This is called middle school, and children in grade six and their parents have told me over and over that this is such a big adjustment for them. 

I  had dinner with four little sixth grade girls the other night who attend three separate schools in different counties.   I asked them what made middle school so different.  They responded, “Well, having a locker!” Switching classes from teacher to teacher is also quite different than being with one teacher as is the case in most elementary schools.

Forgetfulness and lack of organization is the main thing parents seem to complain about.  That, and the amount of homework their middle schooler has!  The first year (sixth grade) seems to be the absolute hardest adjustment for most families.

Some helpful suggestions include helping your child have ONE place to write down all assignment and due dates – a master list or a master calendar.  The parent also keeps a calendar at home as well with important dates and when things are due to help along.  Having a consistent time and place to do homework is very important as well – rhythm and routine is everything.  The hours that a middle schooler has to spend at home may be quite short, considering that in many areas of the United States the middle schoolers go to school later but also come home later, like 4:45 or 5 P.M., and they are likely to be tired, so efficiency with homework is key.

The other thing that parents have shared with me is that they really had to look at the amount of time they were investing in outside activities because homework really needed to come first.  The homework only increases throughout the high school years, so this evaluation is a good  yearly practice to get into.    I know high schoolers in my neighborhood who are routinely spending almost all of their day on Sunday doing homework in  order to get ready for the school week, plus doing homework every night during the week, especially if they are in AP classes or in “gifted” classes.   Forming good habits in the middle school years is important for the future!

I would love to hear from you if your child has transitioned into middle school.  What advice would you have for other parents beginning the sixth grade year to make it a smoother year?

Many blessings,

Still Waters Run Deep: The Fourteen Year Old

Yesterday  was my daughter’s fourteenth birthday party.  She had a fun day celebrating on the beach with her friends and their families.  So, in honor of the  now fourteen-year-old in our house, today’s post is all about the  fourteen year old.

The Gesell Institute describes the fourteen-year-old as “a time of verve, vigor, energy and excitement…Boundless energy combines with optimistic enthusiasm and goodwill to encourage boy or girl to attempt almost anything.”

The plans may outnumber the number of hours in a day, but a fourteen-year-old wants life on the full side.  At least, this is how the Gesell Institute describes it. However, I often find this stage can be different than the Gesell Institute describes– many mothers have described this period to me often as a waiting, a patience and a trusting in seeing their child almost in a cocoon where the surface looks more still than what the Gesell Institute describes –> this post describes this in boys, but I have seen this in girls as well.  So I think there can be a lot of energy for the things the fourteen-year-old is interested in, it can be a time of blossoming, but I think it can also be a time where the waters look so still and mirroring but underneath the surface things are running deeply.   Deeply felt.

Where this most deeply comes out is in relationship to the family.  Fourteen-year-olds can be quite critical of their parents, their family.  It is very personal, and not just against “the rules” (although it can be that too!) but against the personality traits or appearance of family members.  The character flaws of the adults in the house are pointed out, as if the parent and the fourteen-year-old are still so tied together that anything a parent does that is deemed “embarrassing” counts against the teenager.  It is common for parents to feel as if they are doing everything for a demanding teen, and receiving no gratitude at all.  The Gesell Institute mentions that a teenager of this age is at his or her best with friends.   And, most fourteen-year-olds really want to “fit in” with their peers.  They also tend to be friendly and outgoing with adults outside of the family, but busy and in a rush to get to the next thing.  Fourteen-year-olds, in general, have more humor, more give and take and are more open than thirteen-year-olds. 

Fourteen thrives best on a varied program and most especially enjoys extracurricular activities and clubs – athletic, scientific, dramatic, musical.”  I think this is especially important for homeschooling families to consider – many homeschoolers talk about activities for small children or “preteens” but honestly, it is the teenagers who really need connections and activity more than ever to keep homeschooling successful. 

Most girls are done growing by the end of this year height-wise and maturity features now approximate more of young adulthood.   Very few girls have not menstruated by their fourteenth year.  They may be interested in the more complex areas involving reproduction – contraception, and what happens when things don’t work out in carrying a pregnancy to full-term. and even more complex topics.    Many boys have an extremely rapid increase in height at fourteen.  Boys’ bodies become more heavily muscled, deepening of the voice is more noticeable. Fourteen is an age when many girls are good at taking care of their own personal hygiene, but boys often do not do a good job and need to be reminded to wash with soap and use shampoo.  Most fourteen-year-olds have an increased sense of responsibility toward taking care of their clothes and rooms.

Fourteen is not as “edgy” as thirteen.  Thirteen may be full of withdrawal and touchiness, but fourteen is full of life and fun.  That being said, there is still moodiness, irritability, tiny issues that become huge, and they can go completely out of bounds in trying to overschedule themselves and their social lives.  There can be violent anger or very distressed emotions, but these outbursts are generally far apart.  They cannot view these outbursts from an adult point of view so they may know they are critical or sarcastic or other things, but really can’t do much about it or see it much past that.   Happy moods outnumber the sad moods, but annoyance or moodiness is there. Outbursts against siblings can be rather explosive. There really is no hiding of emotions for most fourteen-year-olds and this most often seems to run to irritability, anger, annoyance.   Fourteen year olds are not as vulnerable as a thirteen year old;  they can “strike back” over something they perceive as unfair or be nonchalant, or take things as a joke and laugh them off.  Fourteen-year-olds can take this new maturity and enjoy competition.  They like to compete at this age. 

Ames, Ilg and Baker write in their book, “Your Ten-To Fourteen-Year-Old” that, “By now, the most intensely inwardizing work of Thirteen has pretty much been accomplished.  The reflective process, the living with oneself, the thinking about oneself which characterizes Thirteen are all a bit like an active hibernation process.  Then comes the time when the inner biological clock is turning, and the time for emergence into the sun arrives.  And that time in many is fourteen.”  They are ready to do something outside of themselves and be absorbed in that.  They start to learn how to adapt to the limits of the outside world, and how to make choices.  Fourteen is an age where many adolescents feel good about themselves. 

Many blessings,