Loving Yourself

I see so many mothers striving to set the tone for their families; mothers who are really working to create a family life that will nurture their children even if it means hard work and facing emotional growth on their part.  It is heart-warming and exciting to see mothers who are doing that!

I also see so many mothers who want to strive but don’t seem to have any idea how to take the bull by the horns and be the authority for their family.  For whatever reason, the idea of being the person who sets the tone in their home for their family is scary, or met with fear instead of joy.

I think the root of this may lie in that these mothers do not think they are worthy of being an Authentic Leader in their home.  I have a few words for you today, just for you.

To My Precious Striving Friend,

You know, you are worthy of setting the tone for your spouse/partner and your children.  It doesn’t matter if you didn’t have the best childhood, and have no memories of home-cooked meals or nightly routines and rhythms.  It doesn’t matter at all if you can find the will within yourself to rise up and to want to learn how to create a nurturing home life for your family.

The truth is, this process will nurture you.  It will nurture your family, and it will nurture the children in the neighborhood who come over to play with your children, it will nurture all those who come into your house.  Your house is more than a physical space, but it has an ambience, a feeling, and a  tone to it that you set and nurture every day by having a vision and what you do to feed the beauty, truth and goodness that lives in your home.

You are worthy of having this.  You love your family, and you are being drawn to this idea of being an Authentic Leader in your home for a purpose and a reason.  You, this very day, are helping to raise your grandchildren by the way you love and treat your children.  You are extending your values and beliefs through the generations to come.

You feel confused as to how to take on this role?  Don’t be afraid.  Authority is  not a bad thing; only misuse and abuse of power is…Authority is about making the right decisions at the right time for the children in the family who are not yet ready to do it for themselves.  They need all the lessons you have learn; you have experience in love and warmth to share.   No one will ever love your children more than you!

You don’t know where to start in practical terms?  Start with yourself.  Parents and homeschooling parents are not more patient or better than anyone else, but we have to be more persistent in working on our own areas of challenge.  Work on your courage, your patience, your warmth…pick one area and make a plan!  Read sacred texts, find inspiring verses to keep you on track, study, meditate, pray. 

Create warmth through the beauty in your home, through the truth and goodness you show your children, your partner, yourself!  Ask yourself, is this good, is this true, is this worthy, is this pure?  If it is not, what are you doing?  You deserve to be surrounded by these things.  Rise up and claim it!

To My Precious Striving Friend, you can do this!  Be an Authentic Leader in your home, do what is right!  It is not about perfection but the process of striving.  Overcome your own inertia, your own doubts, your own fears and make a plan to start somewhere.  The journey begins with the one step, and if you stumble, get back up and keep going.  Your family is counting on you.

Live big!

Love,

Carrie

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18 thoughts on “Loving Yourself

  1. What a beautiful and inspiring article, Carrie! It is something I needed to be reminded of this week as it seems the rhythm of our home must change once again as my hubby is transitioning from full time pastor to part time and taking on a full time job. My girls’ world will be “rocked” a bit by this change as he has had a lot of input into their daily lives in the past few years and now that is about to end.

    I especially loved the part you said about …

    “work on your courage, your patience, your warmth…pick one area and make a plan! Read sacred texts, find inspiring verses to keep you on track, study, meditate, pray.

    Create warmth through the beauty in your home, through the truth and goodness you show your children, your partner, yourself! Ask yourself, is this good, is this true, is this worthy, is this pure? If it is not, what are you doing? You deserve to be surrounded by these things. Rise up and claim it!”

    thank you for the reminder to keep ourselves centered spiritually as well! <3

  2. When I read your blog, it’s if you know what I am thinking and feeling. Thank you so much. You inspire me.

    Blessings,
    Kim

  3. Oh Carrie, how did you know I needed this just tonight. How sweet of God to use this space for me (and likely many others tonight!)
    I have just finished a parenting class of three weeks, have learned a few new tools but being the authority and maintaining better boundaries with respect but it is just so very hard for me, I feel I falter every day. Some days like today when I myself am insecure and have a huge zit on my forehead and had to start into a new social situation with my kids, I feel like the child-mother in a group of other adults, though I am mid-30s. This reminds me to take a breath, continue to have my visions, to remember the words “remain in my love”, to overcome myself and create what I want for my family of little men. From the bottom of my heart, thank you.

  4. printing this out and posting it where I can see it for days when I lose heart…

    you have inspired me in ways I just can’t enumerate. Practical and persistent and very, very accurate. Thank you!

  5. Thank you so much for this post! We are new parents to a beautiful 3 month old son and although we have been so blessed with such a healthy and happy baby, I have been searching for the next step in how we nurture his spirit as he grows. We have many people who question our possible decision to homeschool, and your blog and especially this post give me the perseverance to keep researching and learning!

  6. Thank you Carrie,

    This post is exactly the kind of encouragement I need to go on. I would like to begin with the COURAGE to be an authentic leader. But I have no idea of where to begin…do you have any back posts related to courage? I’ve been looking for books and verses to study…any ideas? I like Steiner’s verse that begins “We must eradicate from the soul, all fear and terror of what comes towards us from out of the future…”

  7. Hey Carrie,
    This reminded me of a verse that was said while we did eurythmy: “If not me? Who? / If not now? When? / If not here? Where? / If not this? What? / If not with love? How?”

    Words are so powerful. Thank you for sharing yours.
    Sheila Petruccelli

  8. Carrie – this was written during a true connection to our source and light. I felt it radiate through your ‘letter’ to parents and it was beautiful.
    xoxo

  9. Carrie-
    Thank you for this beautiful post. I have just been thinking about all of this.
    Specifically how I treat myself…my husband…
    Create warmth through the beauty in your home, through the truth and goodness you show your children, your partner, yourself!
    Thank you
    peace and love

  10. That is really nice Carrie. I think we all need to be reminded that being a ‘good mom’ is a process and what is important is that we are trying…even if we aren’t perfect (and no one is). I definitely needed that reminder this week…My little one ran away (not intentionally) and we had to call the police to find him…I felt like a terrible mom, but he was just next door (at a neighbors house that we hadn’t met yet).

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